The War Against the Assholes
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The War Against the Assholes
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Narrated by:
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Jonathan Todd Ross
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By:
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Sam Munson
About this listen
Contemporary fantasy meets true crime when schools of ancient sorcery go up against the art of the long con in this stunningly entertaining debut fantasy novel. Mike Wood is satisfied just being a guy with broad shoulders at a decidedly unprestigious Catholic school in Manhattan. But on the dirty streets of New York City, he's an everyman with a moral code who is unafraid of violence.
And when Mike is unwittingly recruited into a secret cell of magicians by a fellow student, Mike's role as a steadfast soldier begins. These magicians don't use ritualized rote to work their magic; they use willpower in their clandestine war with the establishment: The Assholes.
©2015 Sam Munson (P)2015 Recorded BooksListeners also enjoyed...
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 128
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 116
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Story4 out of 5 stars 116
The living dead are more alive than ever! Zombies have become more than an iconic monster for the 21st century: They are now a phenomenon constantly revealing as much about ourselves - and our fascination with death, resurrection, and survival - as our love for the supernatural or post-apocalyptic speculation. Our most imaginative literary minds have been devoured by these incredible creatures and produced exciting, insightful, and unflinching new works of zombie fiction.
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3 out of 5 stars
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A well blended mix
- By The Lone Mopper on 07-30-15
By: Neil Gaiman, and others
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The Necromancer's House
- By: Christopher Buehlman
- Narrated by: Todd Haberkorn
- Length: 11 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 491
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 435
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Story4 out of 5 stars 434
Andrew Ranulf Blankenship is a handsome, stylish nonconformist with wry wit, a classic Mustang, and a massive library. He is also a recovering alcoholic and a practicing warlock, able to speak with the dead through film. His house is a maze of sorcerous booby traps and escape tunnels, as yours might be if you were sitting on a treasury of Russian magic stolen from the Soviet Union thirty years ago.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Finally - Magic / Fantasy Novel for adults.
- By David on 04-23-14
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Necropolis
- By: Michael Dempsey
- Narrated by: Kevin T. Collins
- Length: 13 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 173
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 158
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 158
NYPD detective Paul Donner and his wife Elise were killed in a hold-up gone wrong. Fifty years later, Donner is back: revived courtesy of the Shift. Supposedly the unintended side-effect of a botched biological terrorist attack and carried by a ubiquitous retrovirus, the Shift jump-starts dead DNA and throws the life cycle into reverse, so reborns like Donner must cope with the fact that they are not only slowly youthing toward a new childhood, but have become New York's most hated minority.
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5 out of 5 stars
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'Necropolis' Rocked My World
- By HEIDI on 01-19-12
By: Michael Dempsey
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The Sky Is Yours
- A Novel
- By: Chandler Klang Smith
- Narrated by: Kirsten Potter
- Length: 15 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 89
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 84
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 82
In the burned-out, futuristic city of Empire Island, three young people navigate a crumbling metropolis constantly under threat from a pair of dragons that circle the skies. When violence strikes, reality star Duncan Humphrey Ripple V, the spoiled scion of the metropolis' last dynasty; Baroness Swan Lenore Dahlberg, his tempestuous, death-obsessed betrothed; and Abby, a feral beauty he discovered tossed out with the trash; are forced to flee everything they've ever known.
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3 out of 5 stars
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a hot mess
- By Alison on 04-09-19
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The Best Horror of the Year, Volume 4
- By: Ellen Datlow - author/editor, Stephen King, Peter Straub
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell, Rebecca Mitchell, Michael Healy, and others
- Length: 16 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 215
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 196
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 195
With tales from Laird Barron, Stephen King, John Langan, Peter Straub, and many others, and featuring Datlow’s comprehensive overview of the year in horror, now, more than ever, The Best Horror of the Year provides the petrifying horror fiction readers have come to expect - and enjoy.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Only a few decent stories in this bunch.
- By Jerry on 12-06-14
By: Ellen Datlow - author/editor, and others
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Halcyon
- A Thriller
- By: Rio Youers
- Narrated by: George Newbern
- Length: 13 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 28
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 26
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 26
Halcyon is the answer for all Americans who want to escape, but paradise isn't what it seems. A beautiful island in the middle of Lake Ontario - a self-sustaining community made up of people who want to live without fear, crime, or greed. Halcyon is run by Valerie Kemp, aka Mother Moon, benevolent and altruistic on the outside, but hiding an unimaginable darkness inside. She has dedicated her life to the pursuit of Glam Moon, a place of eternal beauty and healing. And she believes the pathway there can only be found at the end of pleasure.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Intense and mesmerizing
- By Andrea on 09-25-18
By: Rio Youers
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Hemlock Grove
- or, The Wise Wolf
- By: Brian McGreevy
- Narrated by: Sean Runnette
- Length: 10 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 425
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 385
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Story4 out of 5 stars 384
The body of a young girl is found mangled and murdered in the woods of Hemlock Grove, Pennsylvania, in the shadow of the abandoned Godfrey Steel Mill. A manhunt ensues - though the authorities aren’t sure if it's a man they should be looking for.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Very similar to the TV show
- By Erin on 01-01-14
By: Brian McGreevy
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The Talisman
- By: Stephen King, Peter Straub
- Narrated by: Frank Muller
- Length: 28 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 16,495
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 13,374
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 13,334
On a brisk autumn day, a 13-year-old boy stands on the shores of the gray Atlantic, near a silent amusement park and a fading ocean resort called the Alhambra. The past has driven Jack Sawyer here: His father is gone, his mother is dying, and the world no longer makes sense. But for Jack everything is about to change. For he has been chosen to make a journey back across America - and into another realm. One of the most influential and heralded works of fantasy ever written, The Talisman is an extraordinary novel of loyalty, awakening, terror, and mystery.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Still Good
- By Bill S. on 03-24-10
By: Stephen King, and others
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NOS4A2
- A Novel
- By: Joe Hill
- Narrated by: Kate Mulgrew
- Length: 19 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 17,589
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 16,140
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 16,115
Victoria McQueen has an uncanny knack for finding things: a misplaced bracelet, a missing photograph, answers to unanswerable questions. When she rides her bicycle over the rickety old covered bridge in the woods near her house, she always emerges in the places she needs to be. Vic doesn't tell anyone about her unusual ability, because she knows no one will believe her. She has trouble understanding it herself.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Gripping performance by Kate Mulgrew....
- By Leslie on 05-06-13
By: Joe Hill
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Blackbirds
- Miriam Black, Book 1
- By: Chuck Wendig
- Narrated by: Emily Beresford
- Length: 8 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 444
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 403
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Story4 out of 5 stars 400
Miriam Black knows when you will die. Still in her early twenties, she’s foreseen hundreds of car crashes, heart attacks, strokes, suicides, and slow deaths by cancer. But when Miriam hitches a ride with truck driver Louis Darling and shakes his hand, she sees that in thirty days he will be gruesomely murdered while he calls her name. Miriam has given up trying to save people; that only makes their deaths happen. No matter what she does, she can’t save Louis. But if she wants to stay alive, she’ll have to try.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Not for the faint of heart or kids but exciting
- By Steph on 04-07-14
By: Chuck Wendig
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The Sacred Lies of Minnow Bly
- By: Stephanie Oakes
- Narrated by: Morgan Hallett
- Length: 8 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 169
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 155
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 156
The cult known as the Community has taken everything from 17-year-old Minnow: 12 years of her life, her family, her ability to trust. And when she rebelled, they took away her hands, too. Now their Prophet has been murdered and their camp set aflame, and it's clear that Minnow knows something - but she's not talking.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Bit of a Disconnect
- By B.A. Wilson on 01-01-19
By: Stephanie Oakes
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Something More Than Night
- By: Ian Tregillis
- Narrated by: Scott Brick
- Length: 13 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 421
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 384
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Story4 out of 5 stars 383
Ian Tregillis's Something More Than Night is a Dashiell Hammett and Raymond Chandler inspired murder mystery set in Thomas Aquinas’s vision of Heaven. It’s a noir detective story starring fallen angels, the heavenly choir, nightclub stigmatics, a priest with a dirty secret, a femme fatale, and the Voice of God.
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5 out of 5 stars
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part noir mystery, part philosophy class
- By Alison on 04-14-14
By: Ian Tregillis
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The Fireman
- A Novel
- By: Joe Hill
- Narrated by: Kate Mulgrew
- Length: 22 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 8,327
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 7,697
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Story4 out of 5 stars 7,676
No one knows exactly when it began or where it originated. A terrifying new plague is spreading like wildfire across the country, striking cities one by one: Boston, Detroit, Seattle. The doctors call it Draco Incendia Trychophyton. To everyone else it's Dragonscale, a highly contagious, deadly spore that marks its hosts with beautiful black and gold marks across their bodies - before causing them to burst into flames. Millions are infected; blazes erupt everywhere. There is no antidote. No one is safe.
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3 out of 5 stars
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GOD'S WAITING ROOM; AKA FLORIDA
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 04-25-17
By: Joe Hill
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Dynamite Road
- A Weiss and Bishop Novel
- By: Andrew Klavan
- Narrated by: Andrew Klavan
- Length: 9 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 208
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 171
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 170
A routine investigation into corruption at a North Californian airport sets in motion shocking events that lead hard man Jim Bishop and world-weary ex-cop boss Scott Weiss into the center of a massive criminal conspiracy. The trail of blood that ensues brings them dangerously closer to Weiss's old nemesis, an expert gun-for-hire known only as Shadowman and to a plan set to climax with an act of audacious violence and a murder that would be impossible for any killer but one....
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5 out of 5 stars
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Fantastic Read
- By Peter Gage on 02-20-09
By: Andrew Klavan
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Stories
- All-New Tales
- By: Neil Gaiman - author/editor, Al Sarrantonio - editor, Joe Hill, and others
- Narrated by: Anne Bobby, Jonathan Davis, Katherine Kellgren, and others
- Length: 18 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 886
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 691
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 691
The best stories pull readers in and keep them turning the pages, eager to discover more—to find the answer to the question: "And then what happened?" The true hallmark of great literature is great imagination, and as Neil Gaiman and Al Sarrantonio prove with this outstanding collection, when it comes to great fiction, all genres are equal.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Something for Everyone
- By Nicole on 05-24-17
By: Neil Gaiman - author/editor, and others
What listeners say about The War Against the Assholes
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall1 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Michele
- 08-09-15
Not the book for me
I thought it wandered, in chapter 5 and it still doesn't make any sense. I can't find any connections, or clear explanations. I prefer a storyline that grabs my attention and holds it, this one doesn't do that for me.
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