
The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control
A Path to Peace and Power
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Narrado por:
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Katherine Morgan Schafler
Acerca de esta escucha
Selected for USA Today's Best Books of 2023
Selected as Editor's Pick in Amazon's Best Books of 2023
From psychotherapist Katherine Morgan Schafler, an invitation to every “recovering perfectionist” to challenge the way they look at perfectionism, and the way they look at themselves.
We’ve been looking at perfectionism all wrong. As psychotherapist and former on-site therapist at Google Katherine Morgan Schafler argues in The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control, you don’t have to stop being a perfectionist to be healthy. For women who are sick of being given the generic advice to “find balance,” a new approach has arrived.
Which of the five types of perfectionist are you? Classic, intense, Parisian, messy, or procrastinator? As you identify your unique perfectionist profile, you'll learn how to manage each form of perfectionism to work for you, not against you. Beyond managing it, you'll learn how to embrace and even enjoy your perfectionism. Yes, enjoy!
Full of stories and brimming with humor, empathy, and depth, this book is a love letter to the ambitious, high achieving, full-of-life clients who filled the author’s private practice, and who changed her life. It’s a clarion call for all women to dare to want more without feeling greedy or ungrateful. Ultimately, this book will show you how to make the single greatest trade you’ll ever make in your life, which is to exchange superficial control for real power.
©2023 Katherine Morgan Schafler (P)2023 Penguin AudioLos oyentes también disfrutaron...
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Reseñas de la Crítica
“From an emerging thought leader, an irresistible invitation to reclaim your natural state of wholeness, your joy and your life."—Deepak Chopra, New York Times bestselling author of Abundance
"A valuable, much-needed perspective that gives you permission to be more in a world that's telling you to be less.”—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
"An accessible, actionable guide for how to aim high without overthinking or punishing yourself along the way. This book is a must-read for anxious achievers who want to remain ambitious but could operate with a bit more self-compassion."—Liz Fosslien, coauthor and illustrator of the bestselling books Big Feelings and No Hard Feelings
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Being alone doesn’t have to be lonely. Consider taking time to reflect, regroup, and reconnect with the most important person in your life - you. The Loneliness Companion can help you cope with feelings of alienation and isolation while finding comfort and community in our hyperconnected modern world. Learn how to boost self-confidence and build self-esteem. The Loneliness Companion delivers real, actionable exercises and evidence-based strategies so you can navigate loneliness, heal from past relationships, and gain a healthier, positive approach to dating.
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A completely useless book
- De Anonymous User en 01-26-21
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The Emotional Edge
- Discover Your Inner Age, Ignite Your Hidden Strengths, and Reroute Misdirected Fear to Live Your Fullest
- De: Crystal Andrus Morissette
- Narrado por: Andi Arndt
- Duración: 9 h y 24 m
- Versión completa
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The Emotional Edge is an exciting expansion of Crystal's successful brand - she has tackled weight management, confidence building, and spiritual growth; now she combines all that and more into her most powerful program yet. The Emotional Edge is a guide for letting go of the past and embracing a more empowered future. This audiobook is spiritual self-help designed to teach listeners how to overcome behavioral ruts and engage the world from a happier, more empowered place.
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the world needs more of this.
- De Amber Jessop en 11-25-17
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Perfectly Hidden Depression
- How to Break Free from the Perfectionism That Masks Your Depression
- De: Margaret Robinson Rutherford PhD
- Narrado por: Eleanor Caudill
- Duración: 5 h y 51 m
- Versión completa
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Historia
If you were raised to believe that painful emotions are a sign of weakness, or if being vulnerable has always made you feel unsafe, then you may have survived by creating a perfect-looking life - a life where you appear to be successful, engaged, and always there for others. The problem? You're filled with self-criticism and shame, and you can't allow yourself to express fear, anger, loss, or grief. You recognize something is wrong, but you're not sure what exactly - only that you feel trapped and alone. If this sounds like you, you may have perfectly hidden depression (PHD).
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Amazing
- De Kimberly Davis en 10-27-20
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Fierce Self-Compassion
- How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive
- De: Kristin Neff
- Narrado por: Jean Ann Douglass
- Duración: 12 h y 34 m
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Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compassion. Now, 10 years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Although kindness and self-acceptance allow us to be with ourselves as we are, in all our glorious imperfection, the desire to alleviate suffering at the heart of this mindset isn't always gentle, sometimes it's fierce.
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Liberal Activism distracting
- De Janiene en 07-26-21
De: Kristin Neff
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Make Peace with Your Mind
- How Mindfulness and Compassion Can Free You from Your Inner Critic
- De: Mark Coleman
- Narrado por: Mark Coleman
- Duración: 6 h y 19 m
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The inner critic is the voice inside our heads reminding us that we are never "good enough". It's behind the insidious thoughts that can make us second-guess our every action and doubt our own value. The inner critic might feel overpowering, but it can be managed effectively. Meditation teacher and therapist Mark Coleman helps listeners understand and free themselves from the inner critic using the tools of mindfulness and compassion.
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Life changing!
- De Lisa Ackerman en 12-28-20
De: Mark Coleman
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The Codependency Recovery Plan
- A 5-Step Guide to Understand, Accept, and Break Free from the Codependent Cycle
- De: Krystal Mazzola M.Ed LMFT
- Narrado por: Linda Henning
- Duración: 4 h y 19 m
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You can say no. You can stop people-pleasing and start setting boundaries. You can ask for what you need. You can love and be loved - without sacrifice - by breaking the codependency cycle. The Codependency Recovery Plan empowers you to have healthy, happy interdependent relationships. This actionable five-step program is designed to help you get in touch with yourself, assert boundaries, and communicate confidently. You’ll be free to nurture true intimacy.
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Great content, audio not for the neurodiverse
- De Danielle A en 01-30-23
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The Science of Stuck
- Breaking Through Inertia to Find Your Path Forward
- De: Britt Frank LSCSW
- Narrado por: Sasha Heinz, Britt Frank LSCSW
- Duración: 7 h y 8 m
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General
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Historia
We all experience stuckness in our lives. We feel stuck in our relationships, career paths, body struggles, addiction issues, and more. Many of us know what we need to do to move forward—but find ourselves unable to take the leap to make it happen. And then we blame and shame ourselves, and stay in a loop of self-doubt that goes nowhere. The good news is you’re not lazy, crazy, or unmotivated. In this empowering and action-oriented guide, you’ll discover why we can’t think our way forward—and how to break through what’s holding us back.
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Mental health is a physical process
- De Meagen G. en 04-18-22
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Real Happiness at Work
- Meditations for Accomplishment, Achievement, and Peace
- De: Sharon Salzberg
- Narrado por: Sharon Salzberg
- Duración: 7 h y 33 m
- Versión completa
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General
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Narración:
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Historia
How would you like to be calmer, less distracted, more productive, and more content at your job? You might think it would take more hours in the day, a better boss, more support, less interference, a shorter commute - and the list goes on. Most of the things we think would help are either not in our control or simply not realistic. But there is one thing we can do to achieve the qualities we seek, and it can be done invisibly and often: meditation.
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inspirational and totally useful
- De C. L. Campion en 10-21-15
De: Sharon Salzberg
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Trust Again
- De: Debi Silber PhD
- Narrado por: Debi Silber PhD
- Duración: 7 h y 36 m
- Versión completa
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General
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Narración:
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Historia
During times of betrayal, when we most need support, sometimes the ones we would turn to first are the betrayers. Other times, we’re saddled with shame and fear. But it’s during these times that we need to learn to trust again. This book offers support, comfort, and community to those struggling with feelings associated with betrayal and guides them to healing from painful experiences of it. Listeners will learn about and move through five stages from betrayal to breakthrough and will be lovingly guided with tools and strategies along the way.
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Life changing
- De KM en 07-27-22
De: Debi Silber PhD
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Bad Advice
- How to Survive and Thrive in an Age of Bullshit
- De: Dr. Venus Nicolino
- Narrado por: Dr. Venus Nicolino
- Duración: 5 h y 31 m
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In Bad Advice, relationship expert Dr. Venus Nicolino - aka Dr. V - takes a blowtorch to the shrink-wrapped “feel good” BS that passes for self-help these days. Smart and irreverent, Dr. V fuses the brains and insight of a nerdy PhD with the heart of a doting Italian mother and the artful profanity of a Philly trucker. Dr. V’s signature combination of humor, hard science, and heart make Bad Advice an iconoclastic course correction like no other. Bad Advice is a fiercely sharp wake-up call that tackles some of self-help’s most damaging truisms.
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Not my cup of tea.
- De ocean22 en 05-18-19
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The Anxious Perfectionist
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The Anxious Perfectionist shines a much-needed light on the hidden costs of "being the best," and offers essential skills based in acceptance and commitment therapy to help you cope with the anxiety that is driven by your perfectionism. You'll learn how your "need to be perfect" can actually hinder your productivity and keep you from reaching your goals. You'll also learn skills to help you gain distance from negative self-talk, let go of unhelpful and self-limiting labels, and give yourself permission to make mistakes while still honoring your aspirations.
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Sometimes we lack discipline or motivation. However, there's another reason why you might struggle to make changes in your life - you have low self-efficacy. What is self-efficacy? What are the main four sources of it? How can you develop more confidence in your abilities? These are some of the questions I'll answer in this short book. The advice you're about to read is based both on scientific research and my personal experience.
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The Book of Moods
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Five years ago, Lauren Martin was sure something was wrong with her. She had a good job in New York, an apartment in Brooklyn, a boyfriend, yet every day she wrestled with feelings of inferiority, anxiety and irritability. It wasn't until a chance encounter with a (charming, successful) stranger who revealed that she also felt these things, that Lauren set out to better understand the hold that these moods had on her, how she could change them, and began to blog about the wisdom she uncovered.
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A great book to remind you to not take life so seriously.
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How to Be an Imperfectionist: The New Way to Self-Acceptance, Fearless Living, and Freedom from Perfectionism
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Perfectionism is a naturally limiting mindset. For example, kids are taught to color inside the lines, and any color outside the lines is considered a mistake that must be corrected. Imperfectionism frees us to live outside the lines, where possibilities are infinite, mistakes are allowed, and self-judgment is minimal.
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Renowned psychologists describe the most useful insights from social psychology that can help make you "wise": wise about why people behave the way they do, and wise about how to use that knowledge in understanding and influencing the people in your life. When faced with a challenge, we often turn to those we trust for words of wisdom. Friends, relatives, and colleagues - someone with the best advice about how to boost sales, the most useful insights into raising children, or the sharpest take on an ongoing conflict.
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Not Really About Wisdom. Nothing New Here.
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New York Times number-one best-selling author Richard Eyre contends that the three things today's society desires most - control, ownership, and independence - are, paradoxically, what bring the most discouragement and unhappiness in our lives. Providing a mind-changing exploration of the inherent problems with our fixation on material possessions, control over our lives, and independence from others, Eyre responds with a unique and engaging counterpoint of how to switch to the joy-giving alternatives of serendipity, stewardship, and interdependence.
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The Anxious Perfectionist
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The Anxious Perfectionist shines a much-needed light on the hidden costs of "being the best," and offers essential skills based in acceptance and commitment therapy to help you cope with the anxiety that is driven by your perfectionism. You'll learn how your "need to be perfect" can actually hinder your productivity and keep you from reaching your goals. You'll also learn skills to help you gain distance from negative self-talk, let go of unhelpful and self-limiting labels, and give yourself permission to make mistakes while still honoring your aspirations.
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Game Changer
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Five years ago, Lauren Martin was sure something was wrong with her. She had a good job in New York, an apartment in Brooklyn, a boyfriend, yet every day she wrestled with feelings of inferiority, anxiety and irritability. It wasn't until a chance encounter with a (charming, successful) stranger who revealed that she also felt these things, that Lauren set out to better understand the hold that these moods had on her, how she could change them, and began to blog about the wisdom she uncovered.
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A great book to remind you to not take life so seriously.
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How to Be an Imperfectionist: The New Way to Self-Acceptance, Fearless Living, and Freedom from Perfectionism
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Perfectionism is a naturally limiting mindset. For example, kids are taught to color inside the lines, and any color outside the lines is considered a mistake that must be corrected. Imperfectionism frees us to live outside the lines, where possibilities are infinite, mistakes are allowed, and self-judgment is minimal.
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Please read 8,100,352 times
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Modern Achievement
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In Modern Achievement, JA (Junior Achievement) Worldwide CEO Asheesh Advani and celebrated leadership expert Marshall Goldsmith (What Got You Here Won’t Get You There) offer thirty actionable lessons for personal and career success. Each lesson is part of an innovative Fixed-Flexible-Freestyle leadership framework that helped Advani to lead JA Worldwide and propel the organization to annual recognition as one of the top 10 NGOs in the world.
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I absolutely loved this book!
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Atomic Actions
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Dive into "Atomic Actions" for an unfiltered personal development and self-growth approach. Peak Performance Coach Michael Pedersen has decades of experience and knowledge on this topic. This book focuses on overcoming barriers to decisiveness, equipping you with strategies and processes for success. This self-help book is a comprehensive guide to becoming an "action-taker" in life. Your confidence and self-belief will skyrocket, resulting in success in all facets of your life.
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The Two Pillars of Power
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A famous Hippocratic saying goes: The natural healing force within each of us is the greatest force in getting well. This healing force rests on two important pillars–your mental health and your physical health. Unfortunately, in today's busy world, achieving a healthy mind and body appears to be a fleeting dream. What you really need is a simple, accessible approach…one that supercharges your two pillars of power, and only takes seven days for you to get started. And that’s what this guide is all about.
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Success & Happiness starts with your Health!
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The perfect practical pick-me-up for life's tough days, this book is the perfect guide to help you feel happier, healthier and calmer. We all have days where we feel like the world is getting us down. But here's the thing - you're not alone. From helping us see what strong really looks like, to what to do when you have no energy for self-care; Jayne Hardy shows us that even on our most difficult days, a little kindness can go a very long way.
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In a culture that constantly tells us to do more of everything but simultaneously pressures us to do nothing, Permission to Rest is a passionate cry for a more regulated, resourced, and rested life. Wellness expert Ashley Neese combines personal essays, contemplative questions, scientific research, and somatic practices to help us disrupt the state of urgency, reflect inward, and relax deeply. Neese examines common beliefs around rest and offers support and guidance to challenge the shame, guilt, and discomfort that often arise when we attempt to slow down.
De: Ashley Neese
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The Book of Minds
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Sciences from zoology to astrobiology, computer science to neuroscience, are seeking to understand minds in their own distinct disciplinary realms. Taking a uniquely broad view of minds and where to find them—including in plants, aliens, and God—Philip Ball pulls the pieces together to explore what sorts of minds we might expect to find in the universe.
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The book was like an engrossing conversation but the delivery of
- De JamesW en 11-15-22
De: Philip Ball
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Train Your Mind to Be Successful
- Attract and Get Anything You Want in Life
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Do you want to develop the habits you need to thrive and flourish in life? Looking for powerful, proven exercises to help you change your mindsets, manifest your dream life, and strive for achievement? Then this is the book for you.
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Common sense Rehash of another million books out there
- De DeAnn en 07-03-22
De: Sayra S. Montes
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The Science of Stuck
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We all experience stuckness in our lives. We feel stuck in our relationships, career paths, body struggles, addiction issues, and more. Many of us know what we need to do to move forward—but find ourselves unable to take the leap to make it happen. And then we blame and shame ourselves, and stay in a loop of self-doubt that goes nowhere. The good news is you’re not lazy, crazy, or unmotivated. In this empowering and action-oriented guide, you’ll discover why we can’t think our way forward—and how to break through what’s holding us back.
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Mental health is a physical process
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The New Rules of Work
- The Modern Playbook for Navigating Your Career
- De: Alexandra Cavoulacos, Kathryn Minshew
- Narrado por: Alexandra Cavoulacos, Kathryn Minshew
- Duración: 9 h y 36 m
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Narración:
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The world of work has changed. People in previous generations tended to pick one professional path and stick to it. Switching companies every few years wasn't the norm, and changing careers was even rarer. Today's career trajectories aren't so scripted and linear. Technology has given rise to new positions that never before existed, which means we are choosing from a much broader set of career options - and have even more opportunities to find work that lights us up.
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great book for recent grads, not for pros
- De Jared Gardner en 11-01-17
De: Alexandra Cavoulacos, y otros
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The Perfection Trap
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- De: Thomas Curran
- Narrado por: Sid Sagar
- Duración: 7 h y 55 m
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Historia
Today, burnout and depression are at record levels, driven by a combination of intense workplace competition, oppressively ubiquitous social media encouraging comparisons with others, the quest for elite credentials, and helicopter parenting. Society continually broadcasts the need to want more, and to be perfect. Gathering a wide range of contemporary evidence, Curran calls for both introspection and broader, societal change. He shows what we can do as individuals to resist the modern-day pressure to be perfect, and in so doing, win for ourselves a more purposeful and contented life.
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The Answers I Didn’t Know I Needed
- De John en 08-14-23
De: Thomas Curran
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The Wisdom of Morrie
- Living and Aging Creatively and Joyfully
- De: Morrie Schwartz, Rob Schwartz - editor
- Narrado por: Rob Schwartz, Steven Weber
- Duración: 7 h y 32 m
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Morrie Schwartz, the beloved subject of the classic, multimillion-copy number one bestseller Tuesdays with Morrie, explores these questions and many more in this profound, poetic, and poignant masterpiece of living and aging joyfully and creatively. Later life can be filled with many challenges, but it can also be one of the most beautiful and rewarding passages in anyone’s lifetime. Morrie draws on his experiences as a social psychologist, teacher, father, friend, and sage to offer us a road map to navigate our futures.
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Genuine Advice for all us as we age
- De Richard en 05-16-24
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Work, Parent, Thrive
- 12 Science-Backed Strategies to Ditch Guilt, Manage Overwhelm, and Grow Connection (When Everything Feels Like Too Much)
- De: Yael Schonbrun
- Narrado por: Jennifer Cole
- Duración: 9 h y 37 m
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Working parenthood can be overwhelming, frustrating, and riddled with guilt. It can also be a source of joy, inspiration, and creativity. Balancing rich scientific research with friendly, supportive tips and anecdotes, Yael Schonbrun offers a toolkit to help even the most stressed of working parents grow the good while better managing inevitable challenges. She banishes the idea that the key to ultimate working parenthood is the ability to do it all. Instead, the key is to learn how these roles, together, can help you thrive!
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The book working parents have been waiting for
- De Amazon Customer en 06-02-23
De: Yael Schonbrun
Lo que los oyentes dicen sobre The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control
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- Loli Olivera
- 11-05-23
Loved it!
As a perfectionist I really like the approach of accepting your perfectionism and working around it so it’s beneficial for you. I always hear comments about how you shouldn’t aim for perfection but those kind of comments don’t help because they feel like going against your essence. Katherine’s approach is amazing. Really enjoyed it!
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- Samantha J.
- 12-11-23
Best book I’ve read in a decade
Bookmark after bookmark. A staple read for being a better human. Especially if you’re a perfectionist! 🎯
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- Brandy M.
- 06-20-24
Fantastic book
This was a fabulous book that will benefit so many women. I love her light hearted and funny approach.
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- Jammie Peterson
- 05-25-23
Beautiful
I loved every min of it. I’m a therapist myself and sometimes hearing these words repeated back to me is a reminder to don’t forget about yourself in all the chaos. It helped me map my understanding of my own life in small bits. I would highly recommend this book. I have gifted the book to a few people so far.
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esto le resultó útil a 3 personas
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- Simon Brooks
- 03-11-24
Almost perfect, except the exclusionist gender generalizations.
About 90% relatable to any sex, 5% specific to women, & 5% sweeping generalizations about how this couldn’t apply to men, who are “always/never” X & then strawmanning that all males are like some highly lauded media personalities is highly insulting & triggering. I appreciated the inclusive introduction to women & anyone who identified as a woman. As a “beta” male who grew up in a household of women, & having a perfectionist mother, wife & daughter I can appreciate that they have a much harder time of it.
Ex. That dads can’t feel the equivalent of mom guilt, or any of the quandaries of trying to be it all, etc. is pure bunk. The rhythm of enjoying the book & garnering all one can to self-understand was frequently disrupted by a tirade of exclusionist & inaccurate stereotyping. It took a moment after each incident to pause, recenter, & recall she was only speaking from her experience, rather than objectively, but I get there’s a general perception.
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esto le resultó útil a 2 personas
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- Larisa Massey
- 07-26-23
So good!
I’m am SO GRATEFUL for this book! It’s allowed me to reflect on so many personality quirks as well as some of my unseen/unconscious tendencies. It’s just so real and relatable for me; not to mention it’s beautifully written. Highly recommend!
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- Kristin Johnson
- 10-27-24
So good. So helpful.
I loved it so much I had to buy the hard copy half way through to be able to highlight and underline. I plan to listen again through to make sure I didn’t kids anything and I probably will many times after that. So. Good.
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- Anonymous User
- 05-11-23
Fantastic
This book is Incredible. So many parts of it drove me to reflect and learn about myself and how I may be perceived by others, intentionally or otherwise.
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- S. Van Der Sluys
- 08-17-23
Exactly what I needed.
I’ve been a perfectionist my whole life and this is the first book that I felt really understood me and gave me permission to not have to change who I am. A must read.
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- XYZ
- 10-26-23
Best book ever
First, this book is for anyone with perfectionist tendencies, not just women. I’m a guy and I’m on my 4th listen to this book. I’ve read a LOT of self help type books and this , for me, finally identified my issues. Im a perfectionist. Which involves a lot of other things of course.
This is far and away the most helpful book I’ve EVER listened to from any genre. The author is brilliant and has the most wonderful , soothing, professional, kind voice. Seriously. I can’t believe the revelation in my life. Thank God for Katherine.
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