My Mum's a Twat
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My Mum's a Twat
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Narrated by:
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Susan Wokoma
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By:
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Anoushka Warden
About this listen
My mum wasn't always a twat. But sometime after I turned 10, everything changed. She stopped taking me shopping. She regularly forgot my birthday. And she thought she could heal people.
One girl’s funny and honest account of losing her mum to a cult.
Susan Wokoma performs in this teen-spirited and gangsta-rap-fuelled survival guide to growing up with an actual twat as a mum.
Written by Anoushka Warden, directed by Debbie Hannan and music by The Last Skeptik, this version was produced by Fight in the Dog and Showroom Productions for the Edinburgh Festival Fringe 2019.
My Mum’s a Twat premiered at the Royal Court Theatre, London, in 2018. It was produced by Royal Court and Amy Powell Yeates.
Photograph by Alisa Connan, Camera Press London.
©2019 Anoushka Warden (P)2020 Audible, LtdListeners also enjoyed...
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truly amazing such a beautiful n strong Young wome
- By kelly on 12-22-18
By: Tressa Middleton
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The Other Son
- By: Nick Alexander
- Narrated by: Imogen Church
- Length: 12 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 109
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 97
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 95
Alice has been lying to herself for years, holding fast to the belief that the needs of her family far outweigh her own. But her outwardly successful marriage hides dark secrets, and for much of her life the children were the only reason she stuck around. These days, though her successful banker son lives nearby, his young wife seems to do everything she can to keep Alice at bay. As for Alice's other son, he has always been something of a stranger and has been traveling for so long that Alice isn't even sure what continent he is on anymore.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Wonderfully Done!
- By Ann on 11-06-16
By: Nick Alexander
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A Very British Christmas
- Twelve Days of Discomfort and Joy
- By: Rhodri Marsden
- Narrated by: Rhodri Marsden, Helen Keeley, Paul Tyreman
- Length: 5 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 45
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 42
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 42
Have Yourself a Very British Christmas is a 12-stage sleigh ride through the best, worst, strangest and funniest aspects of the Christmas holiday, with cultural icons saluted, national habits dissected and personal reminiscences from those who've eaten all the mince pies and lived to tell the tale. The essential Christmas stocking filler for every Brit who's ever found themselves on a deflating airbed wedged up against the washing machine in their parents' spare room come Christmas Eve.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great Christmas Fun
- By Robin L Childs on 11-13-20
By: Rhodri Marsden
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Lost for Words
- By: Stephanie Butland
- Narrated by: Imogen Church
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 242
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 222
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 221
Loveday Cardew prefers books to people, and her job in a York bookshop is her refuge. If you look carefully, you might see the first lines of the novels she loves the most tattooed on her skin, but there are secrets Loveday will never share. Into the bookshop come a poet, a lover, a friend and three mysterious deliveries, each of which stirs unsettling memories she wants to forget. Turning the pages of her past will be the hardest thing Loveday has ever done. Can she trust those around her?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Beautiful
- By J.Durant on 05-13-17
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Clovenhoof
- By: Heide Goody, Iain Grant
- Narrated by: Matthew Lloyd Davies
- Length: 12 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 511
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 429
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 426
Charged with gross incompetence, Satan is fired from his job as prince of Hell and exiled to that most terrible of places: English suburbia. Forced to live as a human under the name of Jeremy Clovenhoof, the dark lord not only has to contend with the fact that no one recognizes him or gives him the credit he deserves but also has to put up with the bookish war-gamer next door and the voracious man-eater upstairs.
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5 out of 5 stars
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This Series Is Phenomenal
- By Marcus on 10-27-19
By: Heide Goody, and others
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Dear Fatty
- By: Dawn French
- Narrated by: Liza Tarbuck
- Length: 6 hrs and 36 mins
- Abridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 376
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 293
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 293
With a sharp eye for comic detail and a wicked ear for the absurdities of life, Dawn French shows just how an RAF girl from the west country with dreams of becoming a ballerina/bridesmaid/thief rose to become one of the best-loved comedy actresses of our time.
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5 out of 5 stars
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If you like Dawn French - You will love this book!
- By Pamela on 01-22-09
By: Dawn French
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Spare
- By: Prince Harry The Duke of Sussex
- Narrated by: Prince Harry The Duke of Sussex
- Length: 15 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 70,980
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 65,525
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Story5 out of 5 stars 65,317
It was one of the most searing images of the twentieth century: two young boys, two princes, walking behind their mother’s coffin as the world watched in sorrow—and horror. As Princess Diana was laid to rest, billions wondered what Prince William and Prince Harry must be thinking and feeling—and how their lives would play out from that point on.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Gutterball!
- By Jimmyjoejangles on 01-10-23
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Sweet Sorrow
- The Long-Awaited New Novel from the Best-Selling Author of One Day
- By: David Nicholls
- Narrated by: Rory Kinnear
- Length: 12 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 78
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 68
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 68
From the best-selling author of One Day comes a bittersweet and brilliantly funny coming-of-age tale about the heart-stopping thrill of first love - and how just one summer can forever change a life.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A delight in every way!
- By Jennifer on 04-24-22
By: David Nicholls
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A Perfect Cornish Summer
- By: Phillipa Ashley
- Narrated by: Laura Kirman
- Length: 10 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 45
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 42
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 42
For Sam Lovell, organising the summer festival in her hometown is one of the highlights of her year. It’s not always smooth sailing, but she loves to see Porthmellow’s harbour packed with happy visitors and being on the committee has provided a much-needed distraction from the drama in her family life (and the distinct lack of it in her love life). When their star guest pulls out with only a few weeks to go, everyone’s delighted when a London chef who grew up locally steps in at the last minute.
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5 out of 5 stars
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really enjoyed this book
- By Anonymous User on 10-20-19
By: Phillipa Ashley
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Challenge Accepted!
- 253 Steps to Becoming an Anti-It Girl
- By: Celeste Barber
- Narrated by: Celeste Barber
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,038
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 923
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 913
Part memoir, part comedy routine, part advice manual, Challenge Accepted! is Celeste at her best, revealing her secrets to love, friendship, family, and marriage (oh hai, #hothusband), and how to deal with life’s many challenges - why she checks the bath for sharks, how Nutella quite literally shaped who she is as a woman, and why being famous on Instagram is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s real, like totally, really real.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Prepare to crack up in the grocery store
- By Chicago_Mama on 05-30-19
By: Celeste Barber
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Harley Loco
- A Memoir of Hard Living, Hair, and Post-Punk from the Middle East to the Lower East Side
- By: Rayya Elias
- Narrated by: Christina Delaine
- Length: 9 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 28
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 26
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 26
When she was 7, Rayya Elias and her family fled the political conflict in their native Syria, settling in Detroit. Bullied in school and caught between the world of her traditional family and her tough American classmates, she rebelled early. Elias moved to New York City to become a musician and kept herself afloat with an uncommon talent for cutting hair. At the height of the punk movement, life on the Lower East Side was full of adventure, creative inspiration, and temptation.
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5 out of 5 stars
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What an amazing woman.
- By Canaan Voss on 06-12-24
By: Rayya Elias
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A Thousand Roads Home
- By: Carmel Harrington
- Narrated by: Jill Crawford, Frank Grimes
- Length: 10 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 181
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 166
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 166
Meet Tom. Or Dr O’Grady, as he used to be called. When you pass him on the street, most people don’t even give him a second glance. You see, Tom isn’t living his best life. Burdened by grief, he’s only got his loyal dog, Bette Davis, for company and a rucksack containing his whole world. Then there’s Ruth and her son, DJ, who no longer have a place to call home. But Ruth believes that you can change the world by helping one person at a time - and Tom needs her help. There are a thousand ways to find your home - you just need to be brave enough to look for them.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Couldn't put it down
- By Allison Swart on 09-22-19
What listeners say about My Mum's a Twat
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- 🔥 Phx17 🔥
- 08-08-20
If About a Boy was a mouthy girl in therapy group
Remember Nick Hoult in the movie About a Boy, where he copes with being a teenager in London under his granola, hippie mum? Imagine if Hugh Grant’s character never came along and instead precocious Hoult was lost down a path to delinquency. Now imagine Hoult’s Mystikal rap-loving self as a profane twenty something woman unloading on her therapy group, raging for the whole hour about how her mum joined a cult when she was ten and she effectively lost her mum and her innocence. She tells her tale from age 10 to 20 with F bombs and words like c*nt and twat. You can sense her frustration and anger at her mum, but really more at the cult who preyed upon her. You also see the screwed up mess of a childhood left to her, including hard drugs, sex and crime before age 15. This is Sandra Bernhardt or Andrew Dice Clay raw, where the “humor” is visceral and cuts deep. This biographic cautionary tale of cults and parenting is worth a listen as an Audible freebie, if you can stand the sharp, biting edges. The narrator’s streetwise British accent was perfect, although I felt the acidic monologue played better at 1.3x speed.
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7 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Mystic Madness
- 08-25-20
perfect in every way.
it was just perfect. sad but not melodramatic .. serious but light hearted . it's a short about a girl who lost her mom to a cult . Susan wokoma gave a great performance .
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Suzi Spencer
- 03-27-21
Whiny and pointless
Really, this is a pointless story. It’s neither relatable nor enjoyable. I’m truly embarrassed for the author.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 09-02-20
So Good!
Fantastic in every sense of the word. From the story, to the reading, to the accompanying music. Everyone should take the 1 hr and 7 mins to listen to this.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Coach Bea
- 04-29-23
Witty and Real
This book was witty and real. The performance made it interesting. I could see myself and my relationship with both my mom and daughter in some of the story. Different circumstances, similar feelings.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Audone
- 01-06-24
I freaking loved this!
There wasn’t anything about it that I didn’t like. I will listen to it again.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Julie A Quinn
- 08-15-20
wow wow wow
It is really difficult to pull off this type of memoir without sounding maudlin, and self-pitying. the weird thing is she is full of self-pity, and anger, but you don't care because she is also full of spunk, and self-awareness, and understanding of her mother's vulnerability to the cult's influence. I just couldn't help rooting for for this young woman.
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10 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Kindle Customer
- 08-26-20
AWESOME!
I'm sorry your mom is, was & continues to be a twat. I love the happy ending of you having a good life although I know there are some periods of sadness. I wish, as I'm sure you do, that she had PREVAILED and DEFEATED that fucking fuck brainwashing centre. THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN ULTIMATE. You are a great writer with an EXCELLENT narrator choice. She brought your life to life(LoL). Continue and good luck.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Michelle G
- 09-02-20
Entertaining and great for a quick listen!
The narrator is great! The story is definitely worth listening to... especially if you needs something interesting and entertaining and have only about an hour to listen! 👍 Although the author (and narrator) are successful at making this story funny and entertaining, I can't help but feel a little angry towards the mother, and sad at the degeneration then ultimate loss of the mother-daughter relationship in the story.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- JT
- 12-18-20
Real angst...
We all remember the pre-teen and teenaged angst. Add to that a mom who joins a cult and you have this remarkable story that is performed amazingly! I could feel her pain, I could picture everything she described, and the use of language is so realistic. It is worth a listen.
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