Murder Your Employer
The McMasters Guide to Homicide
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Murder Your Employer
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Narrated by:
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Simon Vance
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Neil Patrick Harris
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By:
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Rupert Holmes
About this listen
Welcome to The McMasters Conservatory for the Applied Arts - a luxurious, clandestine college dedicated to the fine art of murder where earnest students study how best to "delete" their most deserving victim.
Who hasn't wondered for a split second what the world would be like the object of your affliction ceased to exist? But then you've probably never heard of The McMasters Conservatory, dedicated to the consummate execution of the homicidal arts. To gain admission, a student must have an ethical reason for erasing someone who deeply deserves a fate no worse (nor better) than death.
The campus of this "Poison Ivy League" college-its location unknown to even those who study there-is where you might find yourself the practice target of a classmate...and where one's mandatory graduation thesis is getting away with the perfect murder of someone whose death will make the world a much better place to live.
Prepare for an education you'll never forget. A delightful mix of witty wordplay, breathtaking twists and genuine intrigue, Murder Your Employer will gain you admission into a wholly original world, cocooned within the most entertaining audiobook about well-intentioned would-be murderers you'll ever hear.
©2023 Rupert Holmes (P)2023 Simon & Schuster AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
"A case study in the droll amusements of homicide, Rupert Holmes's send-up of higher education and even higher crimes and misdemeanors will keep you up at night." (Gregory Maguire, author of Wicked)
"With dry humor and an eye for hidden clues, Rupert Holmes imagines a secret Hogwarts-like school that teaches the fine art of pulling off the perfect (and perfectly deserved) murder...utterly creative and deliciously diabolical." (Alafair Burke, New York Times bestselling author)
"A college with a degree in Homicide? Only Rupert Holmes could make murder laugh-out-loud funny. This book isn't clever-it's fiendishly clever. And the twists and tricks and endless surprises make me want to sign up for another semester!" (R.L. Stine, author of Goosebumps and Fear Street)
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- By: Margaret Truman
- Narrated by: Richard Poe
- Length: 11 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 118
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 76
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Story4 out of 5 stars 75
Kenneth Ewald has what it takes to win the presidency: the support of his party, a lovely wife, a dynamic campaign. What neither he nor any candidate needs is a corpse. He knows only one man capable of solving a crime, clearing his son, putting his campaign back on track and catching a killer: his best friend Mac Smith. Oddly enough, it was Mac and his dog Rufus who found the body in the first place.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Truman
- By Barbra on 01-01-08
By: Margaret Truman
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Safe Houses
- A Novel
- By: Dan Fesperman
- Narrated by: Dan Fesperman
- Length: 13 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 728
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 634
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 632
West Berlin, 1979. Helen Abell oversees the CIA's network of safe houses, rare havens for field agents and case officers amidst the dangerous milieu of a city in the grips of the Cold War. Helen's world is upended when, during her routine inspection of an agency property, she overhears a meeting between two unfamiliar people speaking a coded language that hints at shadowy realities far beyond her comprehension. Before the day is out, she witnesses a second unauthorized encounter, one that will place her in the sight lines of the most ruthless and powerful man at the agency.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Fiction from Truth
- By Sue MB on 11-10-18
By: Dan Fesperman
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Imperfect Strangers
- By: Stuart Woods
- Narrated by: Tony Roberts
- Length: 9 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 316
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 273
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 267
Sandy Kinsolving's once-glittering life hangs by a thread; his future depends on his wife's inheritance and whether or not she's about to throw him out on his ear. What he wouldn't give for a solution to his money and marriage problems. If this were an Alfred Hitchcock movie, the solution would be obvious. Enter a stranger with wife problems of his own, who offers a violent - and mutually advantageous - proposal. Then, in the time it takes to whisper a word, Kinsolving's normal life ends.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Woods is great even without Stone
- By jasiowa on 10-19-16
By: Stuart Woods
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The Conspiracy Club
- By: Jonathan Kellerman
- Narrated by: Rob Kahn
- Length: 9 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 202
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 94
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Story4 out of 5 stars 92
When his brief, passionate romance with nurse Jocelyn Banks is cut short by her kidnapping and brutal murder, Dr. Jeremy Carrier is left emotionally devastated, haunted by his lover's grisly demise and warily eyed by police still seeking a prime suspect in the unsolved slaying. To escape the pain, he buries himself in his work as staff psychologist at City Central Hospital, only to be drawn deeper into a waking nightmare when more women turn up murdered in the same gruesome fashion as Jocelyn Banks.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Disappointin Departure
- By Tom on 12-03-03
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Eye of the Storm
- Sean Dillon, Book 1
- By: Jack Higgins
- Narrated by: Michael Page
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 326
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 283
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Story4 out of 5 stars 279
Former allies in the IRA, Sean Dillon and Martin Brosnan have chosen different paths. Now Dillon is a terrorist for hire, a master of disguise employed by Saddam Hussein. Brosnan is the one man who knows Dillon’s strengths and weaknesses…and brilliant mastery of espionage. Once friends, now enemies, they are playing the deadliest game of their careers. A game that culminates in a frightening - and true - event: Iraq’s attempted mortar attack on the British war cabinet at 10 Downing Street in February 1991.
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2 out of 5 stars
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YAAA--W--N
- By Trudy Owens on 02-03-15
By: Jack Higgins
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Life for Sale
- By: Yukio Mishima
- Narrated by: Kotaro Watanabe
- Length: 7 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 86
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 70
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 70
After botching a suicide attempt, salaryman Hanio Yamada decides to put his life up for sale in the classifieds section of a Tokyo newspaper. Soon interested parties come calling with increasingly bizarre requests and what follows is a madcap comedy of errors, involving a jealous husband, a drug-addled heiress, poisoned carrots - even a vampire. For someone who just wants to die, Hanio can't seem to catch a break, as he finds himself enmeshed in a continent-wide conspiracy that puts him in the crosshairs of both his own government and a powerful organized-crime syndicate.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Book is good - Narration is just terrible
- By Vyacheslav Varlakov on 03-12-21
By: Yukio Mishima
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Under the Midnight Sun
- A Novel
- By: Keigo Higashino, Alexander O. Smith - translator, Joseph Reeder
- Narrated by: David Shih
- Length: 19 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 128
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 110
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 110
In Osaka in 1973, the body of a murdered man is found in an abandoned building. Investigating the crime, Detective Sasagaki is unable to find the killer. Over the next 20 years, through the lens of a succession of characters, Higashino tells the story of two teens, Ryo and Yukiho, whose lives are most affected by the crime, and the obsessed detective, Sasagaki, who continues to investigate the murder, looking for the elusive truth.
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5 out of 5 stars
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So many subplots and twists
- By Janani Vasudevan on 07-03-20
By: Keigo Higashino, and others
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Baltimore Blues
- Tess Monaghan, Book 1
- By: Laura Lippman
- Narrated by: Deborah Hazlett
- Length: 9 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,502
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 1,202
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Story4 out of 5 stars 1,194
Unemployed at 29, Tess Monaghan is willing to take any freelance job to pay the rent—including a bit of unorthodox snooping for her rowing buddy, Darryl "Rock" Paxton. In a city where someone is murdered almost every day, attorney Michael Abramowitz's death should be just another statistic. But the slain lawyer's notoriety—and his noontime trysts with Rock's fiancée—make the case front page news...and point to Rock as the likely murderer. But trying to prove her friend's innocence could prove costly to Tess.
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4 out of 5 stars
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I'm on #8 - This series is almost unique
- By connie on 02-19-12
By: Laura Lippman
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The Last Refuge
- By: Chris Knopf
- Narrated by: Stefan Rudnicki
- Length: 10 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,017
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 872
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 868
Sam Acquillo is at the end of the line: he's a middle-aged corporate dropout living in a ramshackle cottage in Southampton's North Sea. But then the old lady next door ends up floating dead in her bathtub, and it seems that Sam is the only one who wonders why.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A hero who doesn't work and play well with others.
- By Cholmondeley on 04-04-13
By: Chris Knopf
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Bright Lights, Big City
- By: Jay McInerney
- Narrated by: Daniel Passer
- Length: 5 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 341
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 280
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Story4 out of 5 stars 283
The tragicomedy of a young man in New York City, a writer, never named, who works as a fact-checker for a prestigious magazine. He struggles with the reality of his mother's death, alienation, and the seductive pull of drugs and a vibrant nightlife.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Curiously, mundanely real
- By Amber on 01-07-12
By: Jay McInerney
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Inherit the Bones
- A Detective Gemma Monroe Mystery, Book 1
- By: Emily Littlejohn
- Narrated by: Harper Landry
- Length: 11 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 139
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 118
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 117
Secrets and lies can’t stay buried forever in Cedar Valley. In the summer, hikers and campers pack the small Colorado town’s meadows and fields. And in the winter, skiers and snowboarders take over the mountains. Season by season, year after year, time passes, and the lies, like the aspens and evergreens that surround the town, take root and spread deep. Now, someone has uncovered the lies, and it is his murder that continues a chain of events that began almost 40 years ago.
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5 out of 5 stars
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intriguing
- By Anonymous User on 06-26-19
By: Emily Littlejohn
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Montalbano’s First Case and Other Stories
- The Inspector Montalbano, Book 0.5
- By: Andrea Camilleri
- Narrated by: Grover Gardner
- Length: 17 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 242
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 221
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 217
In Montalbano's First Case and Other Stories, Andrea Camilleri has selected 21 short stories, written with his trademark wit and humor, that follow Italy's famous detective through highlight cases of his career. From the title story, featuring a young Deputy Montalbano newly assigned to Vigàta, to "Montalbano Says No", in which the inspector makes a late-night call to Camilleri himself to refuse an outlandish case, this volume is an essential addition to any fan's collection and a wonderful way to introduce listeners to the internationally best-selling series.
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5 out of 5 stars
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THIS BOOK NEEDS TO BE LISTENED TO FIRST!!!
- By Reba on 12-31-16
By: Andrea Camilleri
What listeners say about Murder Your Employer
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 07-30-23
Fun
I really enjoyed the narration on this book . The story is fun and an easy read
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