
I’m Glad You’re Dead
Preternatural Chronicles, Book 1
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Narrado por:
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Luke Daniels
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De:
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Hunter Blain
Acerca de esta escucha
My name is John Cook, and my life began the day my heart stopped beating.
You meet the most interesting men in medieval prisons. This one time, I met a guy who offered me immortality for the low, low price of changing my diet. I didn’t read the fine print. Because, he wasn’t talking about a gluten-free diet. More like hemoglobin-full.
And now, I’m a friggin’ vampire with five centuries of pop culture references.
Granted, at the time, I was listening to the dying screams of my mother and father being burned and eviscerated alive just outside the rusty bars of the prison cell, and my new best friend was offering me my only real chance at saving my own life and avenging my parents’ murderers - some day.
Except, my first chance at vengeance took about 500 years, and I had to wade through oceans of sin and violence, blackening my soul - and my already dark sense of humor - beyond redemption until I met Father Thomes, a Roman Catholic priest, in present-day Houston.
Papa Thomes taught me how to use my dark curse to fight for the good guys. Like Alfred and Robin did for Batman - except we straight up murder Jokers and Two-Faces.
Biteman and Pope’n.
We stand up for the downtrodden, the forgotten, and the neglected.
By ex-sanguinating the wicked in horrific, truly imaginative ways and having a grand ol’ time doing it. You know what they say about doing what you love...
But our party is soon cut short when we learn the End of Days is just around the corner, and that the fine print of my contract might have hidden a few other tidbits. Like the fact that I was central to kicking off the apocalypse and that the archdemons will stop at nothing to make sure the dude abides by the terms of his contract.
I guess I need a lawyer.
Get ready to laugh at extreme violence. I know I will. If you’re not laughing, you’re learning.
©2019 Hunter Blain (P)2019 Hunter BlainLos oyentes también disfrutaron...
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Historia
Artemus Steele's life was weird enough before he started juggling flaming swords and battling creatures from the pit. Now he's part of a ragtag team trying to stop Armageddon, armed with nothing but newfound powers they can't control, a book of prophecies they can't read, and a hellhound who keeps eating the furniture. As Chicago becomes the flashpoint for celestial warfare, Artemus and his misfit crew must master their abilities, decipher ancient riddles, and save the world—all while dodging fireballs, demon claws, and the occasional hellhound temper tantrum.
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Just ok
- De Amazon Customer en 04-30-25
De: A.D. Starrling
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The Tome of Bill Series: Books 1-4
- De: Rick Gualtieri
- Narrado por: Christopher John Fetherolf
- Duración: 33 h y 35 m
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Gamer, geek, and vampire – Bill Ryder was a normal guy who's now trying to survive in a world of abnormal horrors. Despite awesome powers and a Brooklyn-sized attitude, the odds are stacked heavily against him. Bill must fulfill his destiny and save the world from the ancient terrors threatening it – all while trying to build some semblance of a social life.
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Incel nerd MC
- De KC en 04-15-23
De: Rick Gualtieri
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Tower of Jack
- A LitRPG Adventure
- De: Sean Loomer
- Narrado por: Johnathan McClain
- Duración: 15 h y 31 m
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Jack Atlas, self-proclaimed 'World's Best Assassin', had a simple plan: retire in style and marry the girl of his dreams. Then he gets placed in The Tower—a divine deathtrap where gods pit their creations against each other for the ultimate prize: eternal paradise for you and your friends. The catch? If you lose, well, let's just say your chances of finding a decent bar in oblivion are slim.
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Good one
- De CC en 09-27-24
De: Sean Loomer
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Kane
- Wolfwere Series, Book 1
- De: Dick Wybrow
- Narrado por: Tim Campbell, Maria McCann
- Duración: 11 h y 31 m
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Kane is a six-foot-seven French Canadian. But, a year ago, he was a wolf. He'd been in the woods when a crazed, infected man attacked him. The next day, he transformed into a human. Now, Kane is searching for the Biting Man to get the answers he needs to become a wolf again and return to his pack. The only one who knows Kane's secret is a troubled young woman named Emelda. She needed out of a terrible situation; Kane needed someone who could drive. Wolves who become humans are terrible drivers. He also has a problem with moonlight.
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Much darker than I expected
- De Pamela en 02-19-25
De: Dick Wybrow
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Splashdown
- Land & Sea, Book 1
- De: Blaine L. Pardoe
- Narrado por: Noah Michael Levine
- Duración: 11 h y 17 m
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From the bottom of the oceans of the world a hidden threat stalks mankind—probing, testing our weapons and defenses, biding time to strike. In the summer of 2039, this aquatic foe unleashes surprise attacks against coastal cities around the globe. Mankind faces a sophisticated new enemy, arrived from the depths of space and lurking in the dark blackness of the seas.
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Interesting military scifi
- De Sydney Moore en 01-17-23
De: Blaine L. Pardoe
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Queen of the Damned
- The Complete Series
- De: Kel Carpenter
- Narrado por: Hollie Jackson
- Duración: 24 h y 6 m
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We've all heard the story of the Four Horsemen. Harbingers of the apocalypse. Destruction given form. Four of the sexiest-wait no-forget that. You get my point. So imagine my surprise when I find out everything I've ever been told, is a lie....
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Well...This was a Series I did not know I needed
- De C. McKinney en 09-05-24
De: Kel Carpenter
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The Realm of False Gods: Box Set 1
- The Realm of False Gods Collection
- De: Steve Higgs
- Narrado por: Tim Toddhurst
- Duración: 18 h y 56 m
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An ancient secret lies buried in Earth’s religions. Magical beings once ruled our planet. Man has forgotten them, but they are coming back. Their plan for mankind? Enslavement. An ancient curse banished them from the realm of man...now that curse grows weak, and they are finding their way back.
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Couldn’t make it past the narrator
- De Jordan R. en 11-04-21
De: Steve Higgs
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Perfect Pending
- Witches of Gales Haven, Book 1
- De: Lucia Ashta
- Narrado por: Kate Marcin
- Duración: 6 h y 3 m
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Marla’s ancestors saddled her with frizzy red hair, sarcasm on tap, the Gawama last name, and the urge to run from her problems. Her bloodline was also supposed to guarantee she’d be a powerful witch. She isn’t, not by a long shot. Only those with magic are allowed in her hometown. Now that her teenage children are awakening, and sparking enough power to be a fire hazard, she’s headed back. Even if she isn’t ready. Even if she’s fresh out of divorce court. But then Marla and her kids all but blow up the town on day one.
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Got me looking crazy!
- De SV en 07-12-20
De: Lucia Ashta
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You Are Summoned
- A LitRPG Adventure
- De: Dean Henegar
- Narrado por: Eric Jason Martin
- Duración: 13 h y 59 m
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It was supposed to be another boring day at the insurance office for Rico Kline, but powerful forces had other plans for him. Finding himself repeatedly summoned to other worlds as a disposable minion, Rico must face deadly foes, disarm insidious traps, become a test subject, and run the occasional errand for his various summoners. At least when each summoning is over, he’s rewarded and sent back home. But being back home has its own set of problems, and he'll need to grow stronger to face it all.
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The longest primer textbook yet
- De Sailfish en 12-13-24
De: Dean Henegar
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The Mad Lancers
- A Powder Mage Novella
- De: Brian McClellan
- Narrado por: Julie Hoverson
- Duración: 3 h y 28 m
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In the colonial cities and towns of Fatrasta, peace has never been easy. Immigrants fight amongst themselves or turn on the native population, while the governing power of the Kez Army steps in only to enforce the will of apathetic local governors assigned by a distant crown. Young war hero Ben Styke commands a colonial garrison in a sleepy frontier suburb.
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Not worth the credit , and it pains me to say it.
- De Brett Knight en 11-01-17
De: Brian McClellan
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Invasion
- Heartland Aliens, Book 1
- De: Joshua James
- Narrado por: Phil Thron
- Duración: 10 h y 26 m
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The War of the Worlds gets turbocharged in this nonstop action-packed thriller about a group of survivors thrust into extraordinary circumstances. When aliens arrive on Earth, the tiny town of Little Creek isn't any more prepared than the rest of the planet. Without warning or provocation, the otherworldly creatures begin to lay waste to everything.
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New take on an alien invasion.
- De Michael R. Poniatowski en 07-12-24
De: Joshua James
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Crazy Foolish Robots
- The Robot Galaxy Series, Book 1
- De: Adeena Mignogna
- Narrado por: Zura Johnson
- Duración: 6 h y 32 m
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Ruby Palmer finds herself on an entire planet surrounded by the things she hates the most: robots. Besides taking everything she says way too literally, the robots have problems of their own. A myriad of technical glitches are, on the cosmological scale, quickly destroying them. Ruby has the programming knowledge and skills that matter to them, but can she overcome her fears and find it within herself to help? Her survival, along with the survival of all of humanity and robot kind, depends on it.
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This is a young adult book
- De Lazarus en 10-24-23
De: Adeena Mignogna
warning do not eat while listening to this book
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Setting: our modern world, but with daemons, vamps, etc.
LOTS of action & smart assz comedy. Fast paced story, but it also has depth. GREAT performance, with MANY different voices / accents.
6 STARS
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Vampire Deadpool
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This book is for all Vampire Nerds!! It’s Solid Gold!!
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Refreshing
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gave it a shot
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Great read
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The narrator did a perfect job! I usually gravitate toward female main characters and stories with a little romance, but I thoroughly enjoyed this book! I'm interested to see what happens next!
Entertaining and Exciting
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Luke Daniels’ Best Work
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Book 0.5 DELIVERANCE
Book 1 I’M GLAD YOU’RE DEAD
Book 2 DAWN AND QUARTERED
Book 3 SHADOW OF A DOUBT
Book 3.5. MOONLIGHT EQUILIBRIUM
Book 4. MOUTH OF MADNESS
Not your Sparkly Vampire
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