I Heart America
Short Story Rants
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I Heart America
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Narrated by:
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Eli A. Kramer
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By:
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AHB
About this listen
A short story/rant about why I heart (love) America.
Warning: Written by a Liberal.
©2013 AHB (P)2013 AHBListeners also enjoyed...
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How we see the world matters to how we tell storie
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The star of Parks and Recreation and author of the New York Times best seller Paddle Your Own Canoe returns with a second book that humorously highlights 21 figures from our nation’s history, from her inception to present day - Nick’s personal pantheon of “great Americans". After the great success of his autobiography, Paddle Your Own Canoe, Offerman now focuses on the lives of those who inspired him. From George Washington to Willie Nelson, he describes 21 heroic figures and why they inspire in him such great meaning.
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He is one of basketball's towering figures: "Mr. Clutch," who mesmerized his opponents and fans. The coach who began the Lakers' resurgence in the 1970s. The general manager who helped bring "Showtime" to Los Angeles, creating a championship-winning force that continues to this day. Now, for the first time, the legendary Jerry West tells his story - from his tough childhood in West Virginia, to his unbelievable college success at West Virginia University, his 40-year career with the Los Angeles Lakers, and his relationships with NBA legends.
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Swagger and mirth
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just no :(
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This oral history takes the listener behind the curtain for all the show's highlights, from its origins as Comedy Central's underdog late-night program hosted by Craig Kilborn to Jon Stewart's long reign to Trevor Noah's succession, rising from a scrappy jester in the 24-hour political news cycle to become part of the beating heart of politics - a trusted source for not only comedy but also commentary, with a reputation for calling bullshit and an ability to effect real change in the world.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Not narrated by the interviewees
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The Awkward Thoughts of W. Kamau Bell
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You may know W. Kamau Bell from his new Emmy-nominated hit show on CNN, United Shades of America. Or maybe you've read about him in The New York Times, which called him "the most promising new talent in political comedy in many years." Or maybe from The New Yorker fawning over his brand of humor writing: "Bell's gimmick is intersectional progressivism: he treats racial, gay, and women's issues as inseparable."
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5 out of 5 stars
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White Woman Raising a Black Son
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Seven Deadly Sins
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,078
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 978
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For the first time, Slipknot and Stone Sour frontman Corey Taylor speaks directly to his fans and shares his worldview about life as a sinner. And Taylor knows how to sin. As a small-town hero in the early '90s, he threw himself into a fierce-drinking, drug-abusing, hard-loving, live-for-the-moment life. Soon Taylor's music exploded, and he found himself rich, wanted, and on the road. His new and ever-more-extreme lifestyle had an unexpected effect, however; for the first time, he began to actively think about what it meant to sin.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Glad I didn't read this before buying concert tix
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Nothing's Sacred
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- Length: 5 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 899
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 308
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 302
You've seen him on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart offering up his trademark angry observational humor on everything from politics to pop culture. You've seen his energetic stand-up performances on HBO, Comedy Central, and in venues across the globe. Now Lewis Black's volcanic eruptions can be found in Nothing's Sacred, a collection of rants against stupidity and authority, which oftentimes go hand in hand.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Nothing's creative in this clunker
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Every Day is an Atheist Holiday!
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,431
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,313
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,311
Let's be honest - nobody has more fun than atheists. Don’t believe it? Well, consider this: For nonbelievers, every day you’re alive is a day to celebrate! And no one celebrates life to the fullest like Penn Jillette - the larger, louder half of legendary magic duo Penn & Teller - whose spectacularly witty and sharply observant essays in Every Day Is an Atheist Holiday! will entertain zealots and skeptics alike.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Yes, he curses
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By: Penn Jillette
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The Rants
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 70
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 37
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Story4 out of 5 stars 37
Dennis Miller is back, and he means to shake the nation by its lapels. Miller respects no boundaries. Whether the subject is dope-addled baseball players who can no longer swing their bats, do-nothing politicians who devote their careers to creating meaningful sound bites, or the nation's resigned acceptance of violence as a way of American life, these thematically arranged monologues are funny and angry. More significantly, they shatter the conventions of comedy by simultaneously making us laugh, think, and seethe.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Remember When He Was Really Funny
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Ranting Again
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 114
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 51
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 49
Dennis Miller is back, and he is Ranting Again in this hilarious compendium of wit, wisdom, and righteous outrage. This is good news for all of us who fume at the country's lack of common sense, and seethe at the absurdity of the daily headlines. Setting his sights higher and wider than ever before, Dennis Miller is at the top of his game in a biting and rowdy performance that unleashes his unique brand of scathing wit on anything and everything.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Pre Fox News Dennis
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Me of Little Faith
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 667
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 435
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Story4 out of 5 stars 438
What do we believe? And in God's name why? Lewis Black has the answers. Or at least his answers. He survived Hebrew school and a bar mitzvah (barely), was a 60's college student who saw the parallels between religious rapture and drug-induced visions (even if none of his friends did), explored the self-actualization movement of the 70's (and the self-indulgence it engendered), and turned a cynical eye toward politicians who don the cloak of religious rectitude to cover up their own hypocrisy.
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5 out of 5 stars
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great read
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Greg Gutfeld hates artificial tolerance. At the root of every single major political conflict is the annoying coddling Americans must endure of these harebrained liberal hypocrisies. In fact, most of the time liberals use the mantle of tolerance as a guise for their pathetic intolerance. And what we really need is smart intolerance, or as Gutfeld reminds us, what we used to call common sense. The Joy of Hate tackles this conundrum head on- - replacing the idiocy of open-mindness with a shrewd judgmentalism that rejects stupid ideas, notions, and people.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Why didn't Greg Gutfeld narrate???
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As a prisoner of war, Andrew Jackson walked several miles barefoot across state lines while suffering from smallpox and a serious head wound received when he refused to polish the boots of the soldiers who had taken him captive. He was thirteen years old. A few decades later, he became the first popularly elected president and served the nation, pausing briefly only to beat a would-be assassin with a cane to within an inch of his life.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Funny and Smart !
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Seven Deadly Sins
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2 out of 5 stars
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Glad I didn't read this before buying concert tix
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Born into dire poverty in the segregated South and abandoned by his father as a child, Justice Clarence Thomas triumphed over seemingly insurmountable odds to become one of the most influential justices on the Supreme Court. Yet after three decades of honorable service, few know him beyond his contentious confirmation and the surrounding media firestorm. Who is Justice Clarence Thomas, in his own words? Created Equal builds on dozens of hours of groundbreaking one-on-one interviews with Thomas to share a new, expanded account of his powerful story for the first time.
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- Defending Yourself Against the Badasses Who Ran This Country
- By: Daniel O'Brien
- Narrated by: Richard McGonagle
- Length: 5 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,277
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,179
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,174
As a prisoner of war, Andrew Jackson walked several miles barefoot across state lines while suffering from smallpox and a serious head wound received when he refused to polish the boots of the soldiers who had taken him captive. He was thirteen years old. A few decades later, he became the first popularly elected president and served the nation, pausing briefly only to beat a would-be assassin with a cane to within an inch of his life.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Absolutely One of the Funniest Books on Audible.
- By Josh on 03-24-14
By: Daniel O'Brien
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The Great Gasbag
- An A-Z Study Guide to Surviving Trump World
- By: Joy Behar
- Narrated by: Joy Behar
- Length: 5 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 253
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 212
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 213
Put down the knife, lock away the gun, lay aside the noose - Joy Behar is here to save you from suicide as she hot walks you through the next four years (two if we are lucky, less if liberal dreams come true). Besides despair, the sane response to the insanity in the White House is laughter. On her hit ABC daytime show The View, Joy has been blunt in her condemnation of the comb over-in-chief, and her words have electrified and inspired millions in the resistance for whom #notmypresident has become a rallying cry.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Funny and Smart !
- By MM on 10-29-17
By: Joy Behar
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Seven Deadly Sins
- Settling the Argument Between Born Bad and Damaged Good
- By: Corey Taylor
- Narrated by: Corey Taylor
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,078
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 978
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 971
For the first time, Slipknot and Stone Sour frontman Corey Taylor speaks directly to his fans and shares his worldview about life as a sinner. And Taylor knows how to sin. As a small-town hero in the early '90s, he threw himself into a fierce-drinking, drug-abusing, hard-loving, live-for-the-moment life. Soon Taylor's music exploded, and he found himself rich, wanted, and on the road. His new and ever-more-extreme lifestyle had an unexpected effect, however; for the first time, he began to actively think about what it meant to sin.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Glad I didn't read this before buying concert tix
- By S. Adams on 07-23-19
By: Corey Taylor
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Created Equal
- Clarence Thomas in His Own Words
- By: Michael Pack, Mark Paoletta
- Narrated by: Charles Constant, Shamaan Casey, Pamela Klein
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 229
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 205
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Story5 out of 5 stars 204
Born into dire poverty in the segregated South and abandoned by his father as a child, Justice Clarence Thomas triumphed over seemingly insurmountable odds to become one of the most influential justices on the Supreme Court. Yet after three decades of honorable service, few know him beyond his contentious confirmation and the surrounding media firestorm. Who is Justice Clarence Thomas, in his own words? Created Equal builds on dozens of hours of groundbreaking one-on-one interviews with Thomas to share a new, expanded account of his powerful story for the first time.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Justice Thomas, the epitome of a “Real American Man”!
- By the walton's on 06-23-22
By: Michael Pack, and others
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Jonathan Pie
- Off the Record
- By: Jonathan Pie, Andrew Doyle, Tom Walker
- Narrated by: Jonathan Pie
- Length: 3 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 39
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 34
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 34
Want to know more about history and politics? Then you should probably go and listen to a proper audiobook. Fancy a laugh at some smutty jokes? Then go and read Viz. But if you fancy a combination of the two, this is the audiobook for you. In Off the Record, bitter and twisted leftie news reporter Jonathan Pie picks 10 of the world's worst wankers and tears them apart. Here you'll find the answers to some difficult questions. With extra swearing.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Jonathan Pie rocks!
- By vtindiegrrl on 08-05-24
By: Jonathan Pie, and others
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Grow a Pair
- How to Stop Being a Victim and Take Back Your Life, Your Business, and Your Sanity
- By: Larry Winget
- Narrated by: Larry Winget
- Length: 3 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 294
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 254
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 253
The straight-talking, best-selling author and Pitbull of Personal Development is back with a pithy and prescriptive guide to success. A five-time best-selling author and one of the country's leading business speakers, Larry has made a reputation for being the first to challenge the positive-attraction gurus and the law-of-attraction bozos with his commonsense approach to success. Larry doesn't sugar-coat, and he isn't afraid to make people uncomfortable, because he wants us to stop making excuses, and start getting results.
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1 out of 5 stars
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half the book is him saying "grow a pair"
- By Dustin on 01-08-14
By: Larry Winget
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Gumption
- Relighting the Torch of Freedom with America's Gutsiest Troublemakers
- By: Nick Offerman
- Narrated by: Nick Offerman
- Length: 11 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 5,701
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 5,230
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 5,208
The star of Parks and Recreation and author of the New York Times best seller Paddle Your Own Canoe returns with a second book that humorously highlights 21 figures from our nation’s history, from her inception to present day - Nick’s personal pantheon of “great Americans". After the great success of his autobiography, Paddle Your Own Canoe, Offerman now focuses on the lives of those who inspired him. From George Washington to Willie Nelson, he describes 21 heroic figures and why they inspire in him such great meaning.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Swagger and mirth
- By Tamara Shope on 09-14-15
By: Nick Offerman
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Defining Moments in Black History
- Reading Between the Lies
- By: Dick Gregory
- Narrated by: James Shippy
- Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 3,979
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 3,455
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3,456
With his trademark acerbic wit, incisive humor, and infectious paranoia, one of our foremost comedians and most politically engaged civil rights activists looks back at 100 key events from the complicated history of Black America. Defining Moments in Black History is an essential, no-holds-bar history lesson that will provoke, enlighten, and entertain.
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3 out of 5 stars
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How we see the world matters to how we tell storie
- By Adam Shields on 10-03-18
By: Dick Gregory
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Rick Mercer Final Report
- By: Rick Mercer
- Narrated by: Rick Mercer
- Length: 6 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 30
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 28
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 28
Rick Mercer can always be relied on to provoke a strong reaction - but what he said one fall day in 2017 truly shocked Canada. In a rant posted on social media, the great Canadian satirist announced loud and clear that the 15th season of the Rick Mercer Report - the nation's best-watched and best-loved comedy show - would be the last. This volume brings together never-before-published rants from the last five seasons of the show, plus a selection of the very best rants from earlier years.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Mercer Hits It Out Of The Ballpark
- By Wade Lancaster on 11-11-19
By: Rick Mercer
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F.U.B.A.R.
- America's Right-Wing Nightmare
- By: Sam Seder, Stephen Sherrill
- Narrated by: Sam Seder
- Length: 5 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 156
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 40
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Story4 out of 5 stars 40
The United States has survived clueless presidential administrations before. But no matter how enormous the crisis, the Great Depression, Vietnam, Watergate, or Monica Lewinsky's thong, America always comes out looking like, well, America.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Don't take this book seriously
- By Richard on 05-25-06
By: Sam Seder, and others
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Who's Afraid of Post-Blackness
- What It Means to Be Black Now
- By: Touré, Michael Eric Dyson
- Narrated by: Touré
- Length: 7 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 112
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 100
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 101
A provocative look at what it means to be Black today. This audiobook includes excerpts from over 100 interviews with Rev. Jesse Jackson, Cornel West, Skip Gates, Melissa Harris-Perry, Kara Walker, Kehinde Wiley, Glenn Ligon, Malcolm Gladwell, Paul Mooney, NY Gov. David Paterson, Harold Ford, Jr., Soledad O'Brien, Kamala Harris, Chuck D, Questlove, and others.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Food for Thought
- By Sara on 12-22-11
By: Touré, and others
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Dirty Daddy
- The Chronicles of a Family Man Turned Filthy Comedian
- By: Bob Saget
- Narrated by: Bob Saget
- Length: 6 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 536
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 479
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 478
Millions of viewers know and love Bob Saget from his role as the sweetly neurotic father on the smash hit Full House, and as the charming wisecracking host of America's Funniest Home Videos. And then there are the legions of fans who can't get enough of his scatological, out-of-his-mind stand-up routines, comedy specials, and outrageously profane performances in such shows as HBO's Entourage and the hit documentary The Aristocrats.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Meh to the 2nd Power
- By Hilary on 06-30-14
By: Bob Saget
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The Black Friend
- On Being a Better White Person
- By: Frederick Joseph
- Narrated by: Miebaka Yohannes
- Length: 5 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 464
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 416
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Story5 out of 5 stars 414
Writing from the perspective of a friend, Frederick Joseph offers candid reflections on his own experiences with racism and conversations with prominent artists and activists about theirs - creating an essential listen for white people who are committed anti-racists and those newly come to the cause of racial justice.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Not really a friend and not friendly
- By emax on 06-01-21
By: Frederick Joseph
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This Book Has Balls
- Sports Rants from the MVP of Talking Trash
- By: Michael Rapaport
- Narrated by: Michael Rapaport
- Length: 7 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 611
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 547
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 544
In This Book Has Balls, Rapaport uses his signature smack-talk style and in-your-face humor to discuss everything from why LeBron will never be like Mike to how Tiger needs the ladies to get his golf game back and how he once thought Mary Lou Retton was his true love. And, of course, why next year will be the year the New York Knicks win the championship. This book is a series of rants - some controversial, some affectionate, but all incredibly hilarious.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Gringo Mandingo Mike Rapaport does it again!
- By Kathryn Lara on 10-24-17
By: Michael Rapaport
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America 3:16
- By: Graham Allen
- Narrated by: Graham Allen
- Length: 5 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 187
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 172
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Story5 out of 5 stars 172
What’s the biggest threat to America today? Why are gun rights human rights? And why do so many Christians behave in such un-Christian ways? Graham Allen has the answers. With over two billion views online, the social media star has given a voice to those who feel silenced by the mainstream media and pop culture. Now, with America 3:16, Graham shares a deeper look at the life events that shaped his philosophy on Christianity, politics, family, and country.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Well written and read
- By Sterling Silver Magnolia on 01-02-21
By: Graham Allen
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The Reason You're Alive
- A Novel
- By: Matthew Quick
- Narrated by: R.C. Bray
- Length: 5 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 286
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 264
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 260
After 68-year-old David Granger crashes his BMW, medical tests reveal a brain tumor that he readily attributes to his wartime Agent Orange exposure. He wakes up from surgery repeating a name no one in his civilian life has ever heard - that of a Native American soldier whom he was once ordered to discipline. David decides to return something precious he long ago stole from the man he now calls Clayton Fire Bear.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Kinda like Gran Torino..
- By H Harris on 06-02-18
By: Matthew Quick