Don't Put Yourself on Toast
A Memoir
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Don't Put Yourself on Toast
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Narrated by:
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Freddy Taylor
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Gabrielle Glaister
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By:
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Freddy Taylor
About this listen
When Freddy was 21 years old, his dad, a larger-than-life, successful TV producer, was diagnosed with glioblastoma, a particularly aggressive type of brain cancer.
In vivid snapshots, Freddy recalls how his world is turned upside down—from the entertaining antics of a wine-gum tossing competition in a hospital ward, to the comi-tragedy of trying to decipher his father's muddled riddles as his speech disintegrates, to painful moments of regret and self-loathing as he squanders precious time.
Don't Put Yourself on Toast is a bittersweet coming-of-age memoir that offers a reminder of the power of humour and laughter to provide, even in our darkest moments, sustenance, comfort and hope.
©2022 Freddy Taylor (P)2022 Octopus Publishing GroupListeners also enjoyed...
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-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 50
”When I was little I believed in Jesus and Santa, spontaneous combustion, and the Loch Ness Monster. Now I believe in science, statistics, and antibiotics.” So says 17-year-old Zac Meier during a long, grueling leukemia treatment in Perth, Australia. A loud blast of Lady Gaga alerts him to the presence of Mia, the angry, not-at-all-stoic cancer patient in the room next door. Once released, the two near-strangers can't forget each other, even as they desperately try to resume normal lives.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Cute story
- By Caitlin E. on 08-11-19
By: A.J. Betts
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Gold
- A Novel
- By: Chris Cleave
- Narrated by: Emilia Fox
- Length: 11 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 174
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 156
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Story4 out of 5 stars 155
Building on the tradition of Little Bee, Chris Cleave again writes with elegance, humor, and passion about friendship, marriage, parenthood, tragedy, and redemption. Gold is the story of Zoe and Kate, world-class athletes who have been friends and rivals since their first day of Elite training. They've loved, fought, betrayed, forgiven, consoled, gloried, and grown up together. Now on the eve of London 2012, their last Olympics, both women will be tested to their physical and emotional limits.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Very Good--but not great--
- By Patricia on 07-18-12
By: Chris Cleave
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He Will Find You
- By: Diane Jeffrey
- Narrated by: Claire Trusson
- Length: 9 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 290
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 258
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Story4 out of 5 stars 255
Kaitlyn Best is stuck in a rut. So when she discovers she's pregnant after a one-night stand with Alex, her school crush, she throws caution to the wind and accepts his offer to make a new life together in the depths of the Lake District, far from her home...and her demons. But Alex is not what he seems. And when Kaitlyn's world begins to crumble before her eyes, she realises she barely knows the man she has agreed to spend the rest of her life with.
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5 out of 5 stars
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OMG! Such a capturing story
- By Mike & Dakoda on 08-22-18
By: Diane Jeffrey
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Obsession
- By: Amanda Robson
- Narrated by: Stephanie Racine, Helen Keeley, Thomas Judd, and others
- Length: 10 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 103
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 94
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 94
Carly and Rob, Jenni and Craig. Two couples, four friends. Betraying each other. Wanting each other. All of them have access to prescription drugs through the medical practice where they work, and all of them are fighting their own demons. But can any of them be trusted? And when the lies begin, can they ever be silenced?
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2 out of 5 stars
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Your old time religion
- By patricia williams on 01-23-18
By: Amanda Robson
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High Dive
- By: Jonathan Lee
- Narrated by: Doyle Gerard
- Length: 11 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 107
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 92
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 89
Taking us inside one of the 20th century's most ambitious assassination attempts - "making history personal", as one character puts it - High Dive moves between the luxurious hospitality of a British tourist town and the troubled city of Belfast, Northern Ireland, at the height of the armed struggle between the Irish Republican Army and those loyal to the UK government.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Humor? Not Funny.
- By W Perry Hall on 04-10-16
By: Jonathan Lee
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Us: A Novel
- By: David Nicholls
- Narrated by: David Haig
- Length: 14 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 862
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 769
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Story4 out of 5 stars 773
Douglas Petersen may be mild-mannered, but behind his reserve lies a sense of humor that seduces beautiful Connie into a second date...and eventually into marriage. Now, almost three decades later, they live more or less happily in the London suburbs with their moody seventeen year-old son, Albie. Then Connie tells him she thinks she wants a divorce. The timing couldn’t be worse. Connie has planned a month-long tour of European capitals, a chance to experience the world’s greatest works of art as a family, and she can’t bring herself to cancel. And maybe going ahead is for the best anyway? Douglas is privately convinced that this landmark trip will rekindle the romance in the marriage, and might even help him to bond with Albie. Narrated from Douglas’s endearingly honest, slyly witty, and at times achingly optimistic point of view, Us is the story of a man trying to rescue his relationship with the woman he loves, and learning how to get closer to a son who’s always felt like a stranger.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great novel - my favorite in years
- By Mark on 07-21-15
By: David Nicholls
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The Brightest Star in the Sky
- A Novel
- By: Marian Keyes
- Narrated by: Caitriona Keyes
- Length: 17 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 135
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 76
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Story4 out of 5 stars 79
The Brightest Star in the Sky follows seven neighbors whose lives become entangled when a sassy and prescient spirit pays a visit to their Dublin townhouse with the intent of changing at least one of their lives. But what will this metamorphosis be and who will the sprite choose?
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1 out of 5 stars
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Terrible sound quality, worse narration
- By Jan on 02-23-10
By: Marian Keyes
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The Unit
- By: Ninni Holmqvist
- Narrated by: Suzanne Toren
- Length: 8 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 134
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 99
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Story4 out of 5 stars 100
When Dorrit Wegner turned fifty, the government transferred her to a state-of-the-art facility where she can live out her days in comfort. Her apartment is furnished to her tastes, her meals expertly served, and all at the very reasonable non-negotiable price of one cardiopulmonary system. Once an outsider without family, derided by a society bent on productivity, Dorrit finds within The Unit the company of kindred spirits and a dignity conferred by 'use' in medical tests.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Makes you think
- By Sylvia on 01-30-11
By: Ninni Holmqvist
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The Bright Side Running Club
- By: Josie Lloyd
- Narrated by: Danielle Cohen
- Length: 11 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 34
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 30
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 31
When Keira first receives her breast cancer diagnosis, she never expects to end up joining a running group with three women she’s only just met. Totally blindsided, all she can think about is how she doesn’t want to tell her family or step back from work. Nor does she want to be part of a group of fellow cancer patients. Cancer is not her club. And yet it’s running - hot, sweaty, Lycra-clad running in the company of brilliant, funny women all going through treatment - that unexpectedly gives Keira the hope she so urgently needs.
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2 out of 5 stars
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depressing
- By Jessica on 09-15-22
By: Josie Lloyd
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The Things We Never Said
- By: Susan Elliot Wright
- Narrated by: Kate Lee
- Length: 9 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 161
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 148
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Story4 out of 5 stars 144
In 1964, Maggie wakes to find herself in a mental asylum, with no idea who she is or how she got there. Remnants of memories swirl in her mind - a familiar song, a storm, a moment of violence. Slowly, she begins to piece together the past and the events which brought her to this point.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Disappointing
- By Anonymous User on 01-18-22
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Duet
- By: Kimberley Freeman
- Narrated by: Caroline Lee
- Length: 19 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,099
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 897
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 892
From the London pop scene, to the opera stages of Europe; from a tiny Greek island, to a stifling manor house full of secrets and deceptions; from the sun-drenched Queensland coast, to the silent outback; Angela and Ellie are two women both looking for something. One in search of her identity and her memory; the other in search of the love that she had and lost; theirs is a duet whose last note will not be sung until the heart-stopping climax, when a shadow from the past returns to claim them both.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Gosh that was a great story!
- By Anonymous User on 06-10-09
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Ordinary Thunderstorms
- A Novel
- By: William Boyd
- Narrated by: Gideon Emery
- Length: 12 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 235
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 150
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Story4 out of 5 stars 150
One May evening in London, Adam Kindred, a young climatologist in town for a job interview, is feeling good about the future as he sits down for a meal at a little Italian bistro. He strikes up a conversation with a solitary diner at the next table, who leaves soon afterward. With horrifying speed, this chance encounter leads to a series of malign accidents, through which Adam loses everything—home, family, friends, job, reputation, passport, credit cards, cell phone—never to get them back.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Amazing Story Teller
- By Dorothy on 09-07-14
By: William Boyd
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The Daughter
- By: Jane Shemilt
- Narrated by: Sophie Aldred
- Length: 11 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 208
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 195
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 196
Jenny is a successful family doctor, the mother of three great teenagers, married to a celebrated neurosurgeon. But when her youngest child, 15-year-old Naomi, doesn't come home after her school play, Jenny's seemingly ideal life begins to crumble. The authorities launch a nationwide search with no success. Naomi has vanished, and her family is broken.
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1 out of 5 stars
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BORING...
- By Nyesha on 06-08-15
By: Jane Shemilt
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The Woman at 72 Derry Lane
- By: Carmel Harrington
- Narrated by: Aoife McMahon
- Length: 10 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 774
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 708
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 704
On a leafy suburban street in Dublin, beautiful, poised Stella Greene lives with her successful husband, Matt. They're the perfect couple in every way, and Stella appears to have it all. Next door, at number 72, however, lives Rea Brady. Gruff, bad tempered and rarely seen besides the twitching of her net curtains, rumour has it she's lost it all...including her marbles, if you believe the neighbourhood gossip. But appearances can be deceiving, and when Stella and Rea's worlds collide they realise they have much in common.
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5 out of 5 stars
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So much emotion, I was not prepared
- By RedLady on 08-29-18
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Disclaimer: A Novel
- By: Renée Knight
- Narrated by: Michael Pennington, Laura Paton
- Length: 8 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 483
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 451
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Story4 out of 5 stars 448
Finding a mysterious novel at her bedside plunges documentary filmmaker Catherine Ravenscroft into a living nightmare. Though ostensibly fiction, The Perfect Stranger recreates in vivid, unmistakable detail the terrible day she became hostage to a dark secret, a secret that only one other person knew - and that person is dead.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Dilemma could have been solved in 30 seconds
- By Jen on 05-20-15
By: Renée Knight
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This Is How I Save My Life
- From California to India, a True Story of Finding Everything When You Are Willing to Try Anything
- By: Amy B. Scher
- Narrated by: Amy B. Scher
- Length: 6 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 93
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 83
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 85
When Amy B. Scher was struck with undiagnosed late-stage, chronic Lyme disease, the best physicians in America labeled her condition incurable and potentially terminal. Deteriorating rapidly, she went on a search to save her own life - from the top experts in Los Angeles and the world-renowned Mayo Clinic in Minneapolis to a state-of-the-art hospital in Chicago. After exhausting all of her options in the US, she discovered a possible cure - but it was highly experimental, available only in India, and had as much of a probability of killing her as it did of curing her.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A great comfort
- By Sue on 07-07-18
By: Amy B. Scher
What listeners say about Don't Put Yourself on Toast
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Susie Felber
- 01-11-23
Sad and funny and highly entertaining
Relatable and honest. A very loving portrait of illness that feels heartbreaking and real. Took a chance on this and glad I did.
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