Bleeder
A Memoir
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Bleeder
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Narrated by:
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Jack de Golia
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By:
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Shelby Smoak
About this listen
I am Caucasian, 5'11", have sandy brown hair, blue eyes, and am a tender slip of bone. And I am at the hospital.
A coming-of-age memoir for modern times, Bleeder is the incredibly compelling tale of author Shelby Smoak. A hemophiliac, Smoak discovered he had been infected with HIV during a blood transfusion at the start of his college career. This devastating and destabilizing news led Smoak to see his world from an entirely new perspective, one in which life-threatening illness was perpetually just around the corner. Set in the 1990s along the North Carolina coast, Bleeder traces Smoak’s quest for love in a world that feels increasingly dangerous, and despite a future that feels increasingly uncertain. From the bedroom to the operating room, and from one hospital to the next, Smoak seeks out hope and better health. Winner of a PEN American Center award for writers living with HIV, Smoak, whose work has appeared in numerous journals and magazines, constructs this unforgettable story of life and love against insurmountable difficulties in breathtaking, tightly drawn prose.
The book is published by Michigan State University Press. The audiobook is published by University Press Audiobooks.
2013 IPPY/Independent Publisher Book Award, Gold Medal For Autobiography/Memoir
2014 ForeWord Reviews IndieFab Book The Year Award, Gold Medal, Autobiography & Memoir
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 85
When 16-year-old Alice is diagnosed with leukemia, her prognosis is grim. To maximize the time she does have, she vows to spend her final months righting wrongs - however she sees fit. She convinces her friend Harvey, who she knows has always had feelings for her, to help her with a crazy bucket list that's as much about revenge (humiliating her ex-boyfriend and getting back at her archnemesis) as it is about hope (doing something unexpectedly kind for a stranger).
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3 out of 5 stars
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Listening Experiences May Vary
- By The Reading Date on 05-18-14
By: Julie Murphy
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Like Water
- By: Rebecca Podos
- Narrated by: Kyla Garcia
- Length: 7 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 34
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 32
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Story4 out of 5 stars 32
In Savannah Espinoza's small New Mexico hometown, kids either flee after graduation or they're trapped there forever. Vanni never planned to get stuck - but that was before her father was diagnosed with Huntington's disease, leaving her and her mother to care for him. Now she doesn't have much of a plan at all: living at home, working as a performing mermaid at a second-rate water park, distracting herself with one boy after another. That changes the day she meets Leigh.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Does she have HD or not?
- By Jennifer Greenlees on 11-20-17
By: Rebecca Podos
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Speak No Evil
- A Novel
- By: Uzodinma Iweala
- Narrated by: Prentice Onayemi, Julia Whelan
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 758
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 691
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 691
On the surface, Niru leads a charmed life. Raised by two attentive parents in Washington, DC, he's a top student and a track star at his prestigious private high school. Bound for Harvard in the fall, his prospects are bright. But Niru has a painful secret: He is queer - an abominable sin to his conservative Nigerian parents. No one knows except Meredith, his best friend, the daughter of prominent Washington insiders - and the one person who seems not to judge him.
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5 out of 5 stars
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So incredibly sad
- By Amazon Kunde on 02-08-20
By: Uzodinma Iweala
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A Doubter's Almanac
- A Novel
- By: Ethan Canin
- Narrated by: David Aaron Baker
- Length: 19 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 235
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 209
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Story4 out of 5 stars 210
Milo Andret is born with an unusual mind. A lonely child growing up in the woods of Northern Michigan in the 1950s, he gives little thought to his own talent. But with his acceptance at UC Berkeley, he realizes the extent - and the risks - of his singular gifts. California in the '70s is a seduction, opening Milo's eyes to the allure of both ambition and indulgence. The research he begins there will make him a legend; the woman he meets there - and the rival he meets alongside her - will haunt him for the rest of his life.
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4 out of 5 stars
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The curse of genius?
- By Bonny on 03-03-16
By: Ethan Canin
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Fracture
- By: Megan Miranda
- Narrated by: Therese Plummer
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 317
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 290
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Story4 out of 5 stars 288
Eleven minutes passed before Delaney Maxwell was pulled from the icy waters of a Maine lake by her best friend, Decker Phillips. By then her heart had stopped beating. Her brain had stopped working. She was dead. And yet she somehow defied medical precedent to come back seemingly fine - despite the scans that showed significant brain damage. Everyone wants Delaney to be all right, but she knows she's far from normal. Pulled by strange sensations she can't control or explain, Delaney finds herself drawn to the dying. Is her altered brain now predicting death, or causing it?
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3 out of 5 stars
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Well Written, great narrator
- By Cndee13 on 04-29-14
By: Megan Miranda
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Finding the Grain
- By: Wynn Malone
- Narrated by: Amber Benson
- Length: 14 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 536
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 502
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 501
Kentucky was only ever going to be a summer job. Come fall, Blue Riley would be back in North Carolina, in college. But one job led to another, one town led to another, and one woman led to another. Now, after twenty years Blue faces the hardest question of all - is it time to go home?
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3 out of 5 stars
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The Passage of Time feels undefined.
- By Delennish on 01-29-15
By: Wynn Malone
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The Mad Scientist's Daughter
- By: Cassandra Rose Clarke
- Narrated by: Kate Rudd
- Length: 12 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 109
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 88
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Story4 out of 5 stars 87
Finn looks and acts human, though he has no desire to be. He was programmed to assist his owners, and performs his duties to perfection. A billion-dollar construct, his primary task now is to tutor Cat. As she grows into a beautiful young woman, Finn is her guardian, her constant companion…and more. But when the government grants rights to the ever-increasing robot population, however, Finn struggles to find his place in the world, and in Cat’s heart.
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5 out of 5 stars
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An Exquisite Tale of Transforming Love
- By JTF on 04-18-14
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Outside Looking In
- A Novel
- By: T. C. Boyle
- Narrated by: Johnathan McClain
- Length: 14 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 202
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 185
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Story4 out of 5 stars 183
In 1943, LSD is synthesized in Basel. Two decades later, a coterie of grad students at Harvard are gradually drawn into the inner circle of renowned psychologist and psychedelic drug enthusiast Timothy Leary. Fitzhugh Loney, a psychology PhD student, and his wife, Joanie, become entranced by the drug’s possibilities such that their “research” becomes less a matter of clinical trials and academic papers and instead turns into a freewheeling exploration of mind expansion, group dynamics, and communal living.
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5 out of 5 stars
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STORYTELLING AS CONSCIOUSNESS-RAISING
- By Christopher Meeks on 05-25-19
By: T. C. Boyle
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Marlena
- A Novel
- By: Julie Buntin
- Narrated by: Emma Galvin
- Length: 9 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 609
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 554
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Story4 out of 5 stars 557
Everything about 15-year-old Cat's new town in rural Michigan is lonely and off-kilter until she meets her neighbor, the manic, beautiful, pill-popping Marlena. Cat, inexperienced and desperate for connection, is quickly lured into Marlena's orbit by little more than an arched eyebrow and a shake of white-blond hair. As the two girls turn the untamed landscape of their desolate small town into a kind of playground, Cat catalogues a litany of firsts - first drink, first cigarette, first kiss - while Marlena's habits harden and calcify.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A Brilliant, Agonizing Portrait of a Young Woman
- By Sudi on 06-06-17
By: Julie Buntin
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Swimming at Night
- By: Lucy Clarke
- Narrated by: Fiona Hardingham
- Length: 10 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 65
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 56
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Story4 out of 5 stars 57
Katie’s world is shattered by the news that her headstrong, bohemian younger sister Mia has been found dead at the bottom of a cliff in Bali. The authorities say Mia jumped - that her death was a suicide. Although they hadn’t spoken since Mia suddenly left on an around-the-world trip six months earlier, Katie refuses to accept that her sister would take her own life. Distraught that they never made peace, she leaves behind her orderly life in London and embarks on a journey to find the truth.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Meanders too much
- By Delah on 05-22-13
By: Lucy Clarke
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Breaking Night
- A Memoir of Forgiveness, Survival, and My Journey from Homeless to Harvard
- By: Liz Murray
- Narrated by: Liz Murray
- Length: 14 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 910
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 813
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 812
Liz Murray was born to loving but drug-addicted parents in the Bronx. In school she was taunted for her dirty clothing and lice-infested hair, eventually skipping so many classes that she was put into a girls' home. At age 15, Liz found herself on the streets when her family finally unraveled. She learned to scrape by, foraging for food and riding subways all night to have a warm place to sleep. Then, when Liz's mother died of AIDS, she decided to take control of her own destiny.
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5 out of 5 stars
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unbelievably inspiring
- By Amazon Customer on 03-17-12
By: Liz Murray
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Her Body and Other Parties
- Stories
- By: Carmen Maria Machado
- Narrated by: Amy Landon
- Length: 8 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 633
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 544
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 551
In Her Body and Other Parties, Carmen Maria Machado blithely demolishes the arbitrary borders between psychological realism and science fiction, comedy and horror, fantasy and fabulism. While her work has earned her comparisons to Karen Russell and Kelly Link, she has a voice that is all her own. In this electric and provocative debut, Machado bends genre to shape startling narratives that map the realities of women's lives and the violence visited upon their bodies.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Beautiful
- By Anonymous User on 11-17-17
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Call Me Evie
- By: J. P. Pomare
- Narrated by: Olivia Mackenzie-Smith
- Length: 10 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 309
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 277
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Story4 out of 5 stars 276
Evie and her uncle Jim have just moved to an isolated cabin in a remote beach town - a far cry from their hometown of Melbourne. But Evie isn't her real name. And Jim isn't really her uncle. Jim tells Evie she did something terrible back home, that he's hiding her to protect her. But Evie can't remember anything about that night - for all she knows, he's lying. As fragments of her memory return, she starts to wonder if Jim is really her savior...or her captor.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Wow
- By lolo610 on 03-30-19
By: J. P. Pomare
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Excavation
- A Memoir
- By: Wendy C. Ortiz
- Narrated by: Bonne Kramer
- Length: 5 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 112
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 99
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Story4 out of 5 stars 97
Wendy C. Ortiz was an only child and a bookish, insecure girl living with alcoholic parents in the San Fernando Valley of Los Angeles in the late 1980s and early 1990s. Her relationship with a charming and deeply flawed private school teacher 15 years her senior appeared to give her the kind of power teenagers wish for, regardless of consequences.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Too Much About Not Much
- By Lifeisshort on 12-22-14
By: Wendy C. Ortiz
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Our Little Secret
- By: Roz Nay
- Narrated by: Erin Moon
- Length: 6 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 103
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 95
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Story4 out of 5 stars 95
Angela is being held in a police interrogation room. Her ex's wife has gone missing, and Detective Novak is sure Angela knows something, despite her claim that she's not involved. At Novak's prodding, Angela tells a story going back 10 years, explaining how she met and fell in love with her high school friend HP. But as her past unfolds, she reveals a disconcerting love triangle and a dark, tangled web of betrayals. Is Angela a scorned ex-lover with criminal intent? Or a pawn in someone else's revenge scheme?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Amazing
- By lisa on 12-31-19
By: Roz Nay
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A Single Breath
- By: Lucy Clarke
- Narrated by: Shaun Grindell, Fiona Hardingham
- Length: 10 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 59
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 55
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 56
From the celebrated author of Swimming at Night comes a powerful and moving saga of one woman's struggle to overcome her husband's death and uncover his dark, mysterious past. Eva has only been married for eight months when her husband, Jackson, is swept to his death while fishing. Weighed down by confusion and sorrow, Eva decides to take leave of her midwifery practice in London and visit Jackson's estranged family in Tasmania with the hope of grieving together.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Ehh.
- By A cops wife on 10-22-22
By: Lucy Clarke
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Revised Fundamentals of Caregiving
- By: Jonathan Evison
- Narrated by: Jeff Woodman
- Length: 9 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 212
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 184
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Story4 out of 5 stars 187
Benjamin Benjamin has lost virtually everything - his wife, his family, his home, his livelihood. With few options, Ben enrolls in a night class called The Fundamentals of Caregiving taught in the basement of a local church. There Ben is instructed in the art of inserting catheters and avoiding liability and how to keep physical and emotional distance between client and provider. But when Ben is assigned to 19-year-old Trev, he discovers that the endless mnemonics and service plan checklists have done little to prepare him.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Unlike!
- By Pamela Harvey on 01-02-13
By: Jonathan Evison
What listeners say about Bleeder
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Su-Lauren
- 03-13-23
Bleeder
Enjoyed the story- I know those days of HIV without meds, for many people were tumultuous.
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