Beautiful You
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Beautiful You
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Narrated by:
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Carol Monda
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By:
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Chuck Palahniuk
About this listen
From the author of Fight Club, the classic portrait of the damaged contemporary male psyche, now comes this novel about the apocalyptic marketing possibilities of female pleasure. Beautiful You is Palahniuk's much-anticipated satire of the emerging erotic thriller genre, a mash-up of mommy porn and chick lit à la Sex and the City, and fantasy lit à la Clan of the Cave Bear. Imagine if Ira Levin had a baby with Jean Auel.
Penny Harrigan is a low-level associate in a big Manhattan law firm with an apartment in Queens and no love life at all. So it comes as a great shock when she finds herself invited to dinner by one C. Linus Maxwell, aka "Climax-Well", a software mega-billionaire and lover of the most gorgeous and accomplished women on earth. After dining at Manhattan's most exclusive restaurant, he whisks Penny off to a hotel suite in Paris, where he proceeds, notebook in hand, to bring her to previously undreamed-of heights of orgasmic pleasure for days on end. What's not to like? This: Penny discovers that she is a test subject for the final development of a line of sex toys to be marketed in a nationwide chain of boutiques called Beautiful You. So potent and effective are these devices that women by the millions line up outside the stores on opening day and then lock themselves in their room with them and stop coming out. Except for batteries. Maxwell's plan for erotically enabled world domination must be stopped. But how?
©2014 Chuck Palahniuk (P)2014 Recorded BooksListeners also enjoyed...
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- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 142
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 120
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Story4 out of 5 stars 120
The daughter of a narcissistic film star and a billionaire, Madison is abandoned at her Swiss boarding school over Christmas, while her parents are off touting their new projects and adopting more orphans. She dies over the holiday of a marijuana overdose - and the next thing she knows, she’s in Hell.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Delightful
- By Kimberly S. on 03-04-22
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Pygmy
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Nick Walther
- Length: 7 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 69
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 61
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Story4 out of 5 stars 61
“Begins here first account of operative me, agent number 67 on arrival Midwestern American airport greater _____ area. Flight _____. Date _____. Priority mission top success to complete. Code name: Operation Havoc.” Thus speaks Pygmy, one of a handful of young adults from a totalitarian state sent to the United States, disguised as exchange students, to live with typical American families and blend in, all the while planning an unspecified act of massive terrorism.
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2 out of 5 stars
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No, just no
- By A. McNeely on 05-29-25
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Lullaby
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Richard Poe
- Length: 7 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,687
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,232
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Story4 out of 5 stars 1,230
New York Times best-selling author of Fight Club, which was adapted into a major motion picture, Chuck Palahniuk offers a haunting tale. Winner of the Northwest Booksellers Association Award, Palahniuk is one of the rare literary geniuses who has been able to bridge the gap between a cult following and commercial success.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Palahniuk's New Hit
- By RockyToTheMoon on 01-12-05
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Burnt Tongues
- By: Chuck Palahniuk - editor, Richard Thomas - editor, Dennis Widmyer - editor
- Narrated by: Full Cast
- Length: 8 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 72
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 63
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Story4 out of 5 stars 63
This collection of transgressive stories has been compiled through a rigorous nomination and vetting process and hand-selected by Chuck Palahniuk, author of Fight Club, as the best of The Cult workshop. These stories run the gamut from horrific and fantastic to humorous and touching, but each leaves a lasting impression. Some may say even a scar.
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1 out of 5 stars
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what the fuck?!
- By VANESSA C. on 09-22-23
By: Chuck Palahniuk - editor, and others
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Choke
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Chuck Palahniuk
- Length: 7 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,746
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,102
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,112
Victor Mancini, a medical school dropout, is an antihero for our deranged times. Needing to pay elder care for his mother, Victor has devised an ingenious scam: He pretends to choke on pieces of food while dining in upscale restaurants. He then allows himself to be “saved” by fellow patrons who, feeling responsible for Victor’s life, go on to send checks to support him.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Oh please, not another abridged!!!
- By Pamela on 10-26-03
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Survivor
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Michael Braun
- Length: 8 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 340
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 280
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 279
Tender Branson - last surviving member of the so-called "Creedish Death Cult" - is dictating his incredible life story into the flight recorder of Flight 2039, cruising on autopilot at 39,000 feet somewhere over the Pacific Ocean. He is all alone in the plane, which will shortly reach terminal velocity and crash into the vast Australian outback.
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5 out of 5 stars
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genius
- By J.O. on 06-23-22
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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The Invention of Sound
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Jefferson Mays
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 634
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 567
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Story4 out of 5 stars 565
Gates Foster lost his daughter, Lucy, 17 years ago. He's never stopped searching. Suddenly, a shocking new development provides Foster with his first major lead in over a decade, and he may finally be on the verge of discovering the awful truth. Meanwhile, Mitzi Ives has carved out a space among the Foley artists creating the immersive sounds giving Hollywood films their authenticity. Using the same secret techniques as her father before her, she's become an industry-leading expert in the sound of violence and horror, creating screams so bone-chilling, they may as well be real.
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5 out of 5 stars
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good one chuck
- By Dane on 11-12-20
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Make Something Up
- Stories You Can't Unread
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Chuck Palahniuk, Scott Sowers, Rich Orlow, and others
- Length: 11 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 490
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 441
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 438
For years Chuck Palahniuk has reserved his best storytelling for his readings, often choosing to read a new short story instead of whatever novel he is supposed to be promoting. Make Something Up compiles these previously unpublished tales for the very first time, plus the Byliner social media insta-classic "Phoenix" and Palahniuk's most notable pieces from Playboy.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Plenty of shock, just not enough Palahniuk awe
- By Darwin8u on 06-10-15
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Diary
- A Novel
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Martha Plimpton
- Length: 7 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 756
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 485
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 485
Diary takes the form of a "coma diary" kept by one Misty Tracy Wilmot as her husband lies senseless in a hospital after a suicide attempt. It is a dark, hilarious, and poignant act of storytelling from America's favorite, most inventive nihilist.
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3 out of 5 stars
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The uninitiated need not apply
- By Benjamin Johns on 07-10-04
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Tell-All
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Carol Monda
- Length: 5 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 16
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 14
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Story4 out of 5 stars 14
For decades Hazie Coogan has tended to the outsized needs of Katherine “Miss Kathie” Kenton, veteran of multiple marriages, career comebacks, and cosmetic surgeries. But danger arrives with gentleman caller Webster Carlton Westward III, who worms his way into Miss Kathie’s heart - and boudoir. Soon, Hazie discovers that this bounder has already written a celebrity memoir foretelling Miss Kathie’s death in an upcoming musical extravaganza. As the body count mounts, Hazie must execute a plan to save Katherine Kenton for her fans and for posterity.
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4 out of 5 stars
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not the most gripping CP book
- By andrew on 10-25-24
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Invisible Monsters Remix
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Anna Fields, Chuck Palahniuk, Richard Powers
- Length: 7 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 41
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 35
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 35
Palahniuk’s fashion-model protagonist has it all - boyfriend, career, loyal best friend - until an accident destroys her face, her ability to speak, and her self-esteem. Enter Brandy Alexander, Queen Supreme, one operation away from becoming a bona fide woman.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Just get the original.
- By Quinn on 11-24-21
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Consider This
- Moments in My Writing Life After Which Everything Was Different
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Chuck Palahniuk, Edoardo Ballerini
- Length: 5 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 1,095
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 929
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Story5 out of 5 stars 921
In this spellbinding blend of memoir and insight, best-selling author Chuck Palahniuk shares stories and generous advice on what makes writing powerful and what makes for powerful writing. With advice grounded in years of careful study and a keenly observed life, Palahniuk combines practical advice and concrete examples from beloved classics, his own books, and a "kitchen-table MFA" culled from an evolving circle of beloved authors and artists, with anecdotes, postcards from the road, and much more.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Poetic Justice
- By Dave Green on 01-20-20
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Invisible Monsters
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Anna Fields
- Length: 5 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 336
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 287
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 287
She’s a fashion model who has everything: a boyfriend, a career, a loyal best friend. But when a sudden freeway "accident" leaves her disfigured and incapable of speech, she goes from being the beautiful center of attention to being an invisible monster, so hideous that no one will acknowledge she exists. Enter Brandy Alexander, Queen Supreme, one operation away from becoming a real woman, who will teach her that reinventing yourself means erasing your past and making up something better. And that salvation hides in the last places you’ll ever want to look.
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5 out of 5 stars
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not sure what to expect,this wasn't it. but better
- By hman on 12-08-21
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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Fight Club
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Jim Colby
- Length: 5 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 11,438
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 9,930
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 9,930
When a listless office employee (the narrator) meets Tyler Durden, his life begins to take on a strange new dimension. Together they form Fight Club - a secretive underground group sponsoring bloody bare-knuckle boxing matches staged in seedy alleys, vacant warehouses, and dive-bar basements. Fight Club lets ordinary men vent their suppressed rage, and it quickly develops a fanatical following.
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4 out of 5 stars
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The first rule about Fight Club is...
- By Ilana on 04-17-12
By: Chuck Palahniuk
This was fucking great
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Not my favorite, but still ok.
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A book for the ladies
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So dirty, so hilarious
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Wow!
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Spoilers
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great
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I was not prepared for the subject matter. Started listening on a whim. I found it surprisingly good.
Wow
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crazy amazing
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So weird
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