Beautiful Chaos

By: Devon McCormack, Riley Hart

Narrated by: Michael Dean

Silas

My home is my sanctuary. Or is it my prison? Some days it's hard to tell.

I've confined myself behind these walls for protection. I have my reasons, but that doesn't change the profound loneliness I've discovered in the process.

Then one day I find myself drifting toward the window to see him. Corey Marshall, my new neighbor. Quiet, reserved, and cute as can be. He infects my thoughts, becomes the image I fantasize about.

I want to taste his lips, smell his scent...feel what it's like to be inside him.

And soon, watching becomes exchanging gifts and messages, which becomes so much more.

It's wrong to want this as badly as I do, but I can't help myself. I crave him so desperately. It's hard to tell if what we're doing is going to make me lose my mind or change my entire world, but it's too late to turn back now....

Corey

I've never been quite right. Too high or too low. Pain is my constant companion...at the hands of my abusive ex, and often from myself. The sweet relief is only temporary, but in those moments, it's like I can finally breathe.

Then I meet him. Silas Rizner calms the chaotic storms inside me. He makes me feel loved, treasured, even when I don't deserve it. I cherish the moments we share - cooking, cuddling, and when Silas reads to me until I fall asleep. When he's inside me, it's the only time in my life I've ever felt complete.

Silas becomes the glue that holds me together, that bandages my scars. Inside the walls of his home, we're almost safe, but our demons are always there, waiting to break free.

We're a mess. We're broken, chaotic, beautiful; we're in love.

But not even love can slay our monsters. No, only we can do that.

Unless our monsters destroy us first.

TRIGGERS: Self-harm, depression, anxiety, mentions of past domestic violence.

*While the sexual situations depicted in Beautiful Chaos are imperative to the characters' development throughout the course of the novel, listeners are advised to hear the "Dear Reader" letter at the beginning of the book to help them make an informed decision about whether this particular story will be to their tastes.

©2018 Devon McCormack, Riley Hart (P)2018 Devon McCormack, Riley Hart

Dark, but powerful

I am really glad there was a pro-log on this book it helped setup the situation. The characters are amazing and the story was almost over powering. Very well done to Devon, Riley, and of course Michael.

One of the best books I have heard

This book had a good subject matter was written with great research care, and understanding. One of the best books I have read

Oh my broken heart!

This book...my heart broke for these 2 beautiful, broken men. The intense trauma both of them survived to then be able to find each other...breathtaking! Michael Pauley always delivers a stellar performance. I'm telling everyone how much I loved this book❤❤❤

beautiful

this story was so great it made me cry and laugh I really felt their pain. the way they found one another in the dark and then decided if they were going to be together they had to fix themselves apart. that their love showed them they were only living a half life.

Mind blowing and so beautiful!

My first book by Riley and Devon and it literally blew my mind! Beyond beautiful! A phenomenal and wonderful story! Not for the faint of heart! An incredible emotional roller coaster! Probably my favorite book this year! I love it so much! Michael Dean is extraordinary! He is just exquisite! His voice helped me finish it! So much angst and such intense emotions! Thank you Riley, Devon, and Michael! You rock to the moon and back! Listen to this beautiful story! It’s so worth it!

Sad but Evocative Story

A gentle woven story of painful pasts and finding light. Not a story for the faint of heart

Beautiful story, can't stand the narrator

I liked the story and the characters and how they fell for one another a lot. I almost didn't finish it though because I didn't enjoy the narrator. I'm glad I did finish but I just couldn't stand the narrators sing songy, extra dramatic narration. As someone who is passionate about mental health, I appreciate how the story was told and some of the choices the characters made for themselves towards the end. Beautiful overall

Speechless!

After my first go at this type of genre-with "Still Your Guy"- I wasn't sure if another book would be just as satisfying. I should have known that given the more serious subject matter, it would be even more intense! This isn't for the faint of heart, and a full box of tissues are def recommended.
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I obviously have parts of Silas & Corey within me (fear, anxiety, a bipolar disorder, depression) and as such, while I listened with anxious anticipation to each new chapter, part of me worried about what the next page would unleash, almost to the point of dreading the unrealistic possibility of an unhappy ending. Could such pain & sadness turn into stronger happiness and acceptance?!
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The lives of these 2 characters were so beautifully flawed, realistic and equally balanced, how could you not fall in love with them and their love for each other, and be rooting for them to find their happily ever after?! How many people out there are also living their daily lives as a struggle due to the damage and harm inflicted at the hands of another? So many also more alone, or not as fortunate to find a hand reaching out to pull them up, or with the courage to say "I need help". There's a saying that goes something like, if we all had the opportunity to put our problems in a pile, then choose from all those stacks before us, we'd still choose our own, because we never really know the depths of what another is going through regardless of how it looks on the surface.
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Although I would love a sequel, I'm content knowing that the sky's the limit for Corey & Silas!
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As with the previous title, I just had to have the actual book to add to my budding collection, although part of me knows that once again, the amazing talents of narrator Michael Dean made this story that much better. I think listening to him read an old phone book would hold my attention, and probably turn me on nearly just as much! He's usually the first thing I look for when searching for my next romantic adventure.
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Thank you, Devon, Riley & Michael! ❤️❤️❤️

I applaud the authors!

I originally purchased this as a Kindle book. I still have it and have read it more than once. I was excited to see it listed on Audible and to my hearts satisfaction I was not let down at all!

These two were able to show case the tragic issues of 2 men, bring them together to help start their healing. It was beautiful, it was chaos, it was a beautiful chaos! They were able to capture the thoughts and feeling of these two individual men like if it were a perfect storm. I could identify with them, and the feeling that made me feel someone finally understood me.

I will say if you have trigger points, this book is not for you at all. i luckily, do not have those trigger points in my life, but can identify with each character, the stories the feelings, the insecurities. Devon McCormack and Riley Hart, you deserve a standing ovation for this one! Well done!

The narrator: It was like a love/hate relationship through the entire book. I wanted to hate it, but then he did a scene that showcased the power of his voice. The climbing drama, fast paced dialog, the heartfelt breaths... the control ... my heart would race... my mind would was hanging on every word as his voice rose and fell with each climax of the story line.. and when we were back to the normal I was in awe of the way he controlled the story. I sat back in awe... my own body breathless and feeling like I had been through it with the character.

Then we were back to the normal dialog... and I wanted to love it... but his voice seemed almost weak. At times the warble that he has almost made it sound robotic, like when you use a computer generated voice to do the reading for you. The voice did not showcase the beautiful masculinity of the cover picture or even the strong domineering person that took control and dominated men during the video sessions or even when the 2 characters got together in the sexual scenes. He felt weak, he felt whimpy, he felt flat. There was that thing in his voice that kept me going, hanging on for the next dramatic pick me up that left me breathless.

I am not sure if it just the few that I have read, since I don't read many gay books between men, but I do occasionally dip my toes in Kindle books, but the samples and the couple books I have tried here on Audible the men seem... (I don't want to offend anyone, as it is not my intension to do so) but they seem obviously gay, flamboyant? Maybe that is a better word. I would have loved to have heard this book done with a more manly type style, but then I guess I would have really missed out on the power and control Michael Dean has over his voice.

Beautiful Chaos!

This is a moving story of two men who have been affected with horrible things that affected their .dental and physical health. Good with love