Antihooliganism
Balloon Boy and the Porcupine Pals, Book 1
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Antihooliganism
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Narrated by:
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Ian McEuen
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By:
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Mort Gloss
About this listen
Balloon has always been a morbidly obese moron. But recently, something about his feeble brain has changed. Every time he guesses, he’s right. Victory, the girl he’s been crushing on for over 10 years, needs his abilities to save her dying father.
Desperate for her affection, Balloon agrees to help. There’s only one catch: The cure is over 29 million light years away, perched on a pedestal at the center of the Sombrero Galaxy. Transforming his single-wide trailer into a white trash spaceship, Balloon races to save Victory’s father. Along the way, he encounters an alien regime bent on his annihilation and a few new friends who feed him tacos.
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-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 203
During the day, he’s a South Chicago high school janitor, slopping a mop around from nine o’clock to three o’clock, five days a week. At night, hiding out in a boarded-up factory, he attends to his damaged interstellar spacecraft, making repairs and counting the days until he can return to his homeworld of Calunoth. All he needs to do is mind his own business and avoid any messy human dramas for just a few more weeks. But it is on one of those quiet nights when he hears them outside: the MP140s. Named for a police radio code for murder, they're among the most ruthless killers.
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3 out of 5 stars
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depressing as hell
- By Christopher L Rader on 08-20-20
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You're Going to Mars!
- By: Rob Dircks
- Narrated by: Khristine Hvam
- Length: 11 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 4,057
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,718
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3,706
Living and slaving in Fill City One, you get used to the smell. We call it the Everpresent Stink. But every once in a while, on a spring day with a breeze, it clears away enough to remind us that there is something more out there. Most Fillers' wildest dreams would be just to get past the walls and live in the mainland. But my dream? It’s a little bigger. I’m going to Mars.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Reviewers Choice Award, its that good
- By Midwestbonsai on 11-13-18
By: Rob Dircks
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Level Up
- One Up Series, Book 1
- By: Craig Anderson
- Narrated by: Peter Noble
- Length: 8 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 681
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 613
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 611
What would the world be like if video game rules suddenly applied? Marcus is about to find out. After a freak accident, he finds himself stuck between a game and the real world. He’ll need to fight his way through football hooligans, carnies, and the dreaded RNG to get to the final boss and save the world. Anything less means it’s game over for good. Along the way, he’ll learn new skills, chase epic loot, and, most importantly of all, level up!
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2 out of 5 stars
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voice very bad
- By Anonymous User on 06-02-20
By: Craig Anderson
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Guardian Ship
- By: Mark Wayne McGinnis
- Narrated by: Adam Gold
- Length: 10 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 204
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 188
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 187
Dominic Moretti was dealing with a lot of issues. Life hadn’t been easy since returning home from Afghanistan. His marriage was on the rocks, his sports betting was out of control, and he was hanging out with the wrong cronies in Manhattan’s Little Italy - just another war hero who couldn’t piece his life back together in the real world. Also, there was that strange, annoying feeling that he was being watched.... Humankind was indeed being evaluated, by the highly advanced Khantam Lom, an alien species in control of much of the galaxy.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Different and enjoyable story concept
- By Dennis on 10-04-19
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Mimic and the Space Engineer Omnibus
- Space Shifter Chronicles, Books 1-3
- By: James David Victor
- Narrated by: Nick Tecosky
- Length: 7 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 73
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 62
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 62
Higgens has the best job in the galaxy. Except for the fact that he’s technically a janitor on a galactic mining vessel. When he discovers an unknown alien species, his world gets turned upside down. He will have to find unlikely allies if he is going to save his new friend and help her build a new home. The Mimic and the Space Engineer boxed set contains the first three books in the Space Shifter Chronicles. If you like fast-paced space adventures with engaging, and quirky, characters, you will love Higgens, Mimic, and their adventures in space.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Interesting premise, but I've read better
- By Reviewer on 12-05-20
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Guardians of the Galaxy
- Collect Them All
- By: Corinne Duyvis, Marvel
- Narrated by: Scott McCormick, full cast
- Length: 8 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 113
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 101
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 101
When the Guardians attempt to evacuate a Kree prison planet and end up in a fight for their lives - what else is new? - they discover their old pal Groot is stretched a little thin. Someone is planting stolen branches of the monosyllabic hero and selling the saplings across the galaxy! The search to find Groot's missing pieces forces the Guardians into an alliance with the unscrupulous Collector, but the real problem is more complicated than he wants them to believe.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Same old same old
- By B. Williams on 06-14-21
By: Corinne Duyvis, and others
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Will Save the Galaxy for Food
- By: Yahtzee Croshaw
- Narrated by: Yahtzee Croshaw
- Length: 10 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 10,994
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 10,108
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 10,089
Space travel just isn't what it used to be. With the invention of quantum teleportation, space heroes aren't needed anymore. When one particularly unlucky ex-adventurer masquerades as famous pilot and hate figure Jacques McKeown, he's sucked into an ever-deepening corporate and political intrigue. Between space pirates, adorable deadly creatures, and a missing fortune in royalties, saving the universe was never this difficult!
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4 out of 5 stars
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Great
- By K. F. on 03-09-17
By: Yahtzee Croshaw
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Interstellar Caveman
- Interstellar Caveman, Book 1
- By: Karl Beecher
- Narrated by: Steve West
- Length: 10 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 187
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 168
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Story4 out of 5 stars 168
You think you’re struggling to find your place in the universe? Consider poor old Colin Douglass, a terminally ill insurance agent who awakens from centuries in cryogenic freeze to find Earth is a devastated wasteland. Now, he’s being pursued by a homicidal interstellar tourist board, and calculating insurance dividends is as outdated as making stone axes. Sci-fi-hating technophobe Colin seeks a cure for his illness in this strange new galaxy where toilets talk back, and door handles are a long-forgotten relic.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Hairy knees won't stop Colin!
- By Willis Burns on 11-19-19
By: Karl Beecher
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Vigilante
- By: Michael Anderle, Natalie Grey
- Narrated by: Chris Andrew Ciulla
- Length: 6 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 63
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 58
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 58
When a mine owner thinks that he's above the law and continues to utilize slave labor to keep his mines running, Barnabas, a former Ranger One, must fight for justice.
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5 out of 5 stars
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If I could I would give 10 stars..
- By Trish R. on 08-05-21
By: Michael Anderle, and others
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Max of the Rebellion
- The Last Time Loop, Book 1
- By: Anton Emelianov, Sergei Savinov
- Narrated by: Joshua Story
- Length: 10 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 139
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 123
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Story4 out of 5 stars 121
Any kind of death annuls everything except his present knowledge and returns him to the past. This is a good way to test all sorts of things. That is, it would be, if not for one little thing.... This loop has real lords and it's unlikely that they'll be happy to hear about an uninvited guest. And that isn't his only problem - all of his memories of the last year have simply disappeared, but the world around him has changed in the meantime.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Not Great
- By Erik on 04-30-20
By: Anton Emelianov, and others
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Gateway
- By: Frederik Pohl
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman, Robert J. Sawyer
- Length: 8 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 3,912
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,402
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Story4 out of 5 stars 3,412
When prospector Bob Broadhead went out to Gateway on the Heechee spacecraft, he decided he would know which was the right mission to make him his fortune. Three missions later, now famous and permanently rich, Robinette Broadhead has to face what happened to him and what he is...in a journey into himself as perilous and even more horrifying than the nightmare trip through the interstellar void that he drove himself to take!
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5 out of 5 stars
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A human-focused SF classic
- By Ryan on 12-05-13
By: Frederik Pohl
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Diary of a 6th Grade Ninja
- By: Marcus Emerson
- Narrated by: Josh Hurley
- Length: 1 hr and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 196
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 129
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 129
My name is Chase Cooper, and I'm a 6th grade ninja. It's my first day at a different school and the only person I know is my cousin, Zoe (but she might be a little too cool for me). I was just another scrawny kid until a group of ninjas recruited me into their clan. It was a world of trouble I wasn't prepared for, which is why I kept this diary (or "chronicle" as my dad would call it) - to warn other kids about the dangers of becoming a ninja. They say history is destined to repeat itself...well, not if I can help it.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Amazing boo
- By Anonymous User on 04-17-20
By: Marcus Emerson
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Starter
- A Monster-Battling LitRPG (Djinn Tamer - Bronze League, Book 1)
- By: Derek Alan Siddoway, A.J. Cerna
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 279
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 265
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Story4 out of 5 stars 264
Jackson Hunt wants nothing more than to be a professional monster tamer - skilled trainers who raise and battle magical creatures called Djinn. He longs for the day when he comes of age and can leave home to pursue his dreams of taming Djinn. Unfortunately for Jackson, dreams and reality don’t always coincide. To help his grandmother make ends meet, Jackson spends his days doing manual labor on a breeder’s ranch - just about as far removed from the bright lights and roaring crowds of the DBL (Djinn Battle League) as it gets.
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5 out of 5 stars
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I had no idea I needed this!
- By H. Hookks III on 09-24-19
By: Derek Alan Siddoway, and others
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Not Alone: First Encounter
- By: Craig A. Falconer
- Narrated by: James Patrick Cronin
- Length: 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 75
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 66
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Story4 out of 5 stars 64
Not Alone: First Encounter is a prequel to the globally acclaimed Not Alone series, set several years before two worlds collide under the weight of the grandest conspiracy of all time. For the first time ever, First Encounter lifts the curtain on a deadly series of events surrounding the initial meeting between the ruthless Richard Walker - untouchable head of the controversial Interspace Defense Agency - and a young truth-seeker from Birchwood, Colorado....
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5 out of 5 stars
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Already part of Not Alone: Origins
- By Danny on 07-25-21
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The Game
- The Game Is Life, Book 1
- By: Terry Schott
- Narrated by: Luke Daniels
- Length: 9 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 2,335
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 2,148
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 2,143
What if life as we know it was just a game? What if instead of traditional schools, children learned by participating in a virtual reality simulation, one that allowed them to experience "life" from birth to death - multiple times? What if one player, on his final play, could change the world forever?
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2 out of 5 stars
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A good concept mired by lazy writing.
- By Khada on 01-03-17
By: Terry Schott
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Off to Be the Wizard
- Magic 2.0, Book 1
- By: Scott Meyer
- Narrated by: Luke Daniels
- Length: 10 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 31,401
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 28,904
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 28,897
It's a simple story. Boy finds proof that reality is a computer program. Boy uses program to manipulate time and space. Boy gets in trouble. Boy flees back in time to Medieval England to live as a wizard while he tries to think of a way to fix things. Boy gets in more trouble. Oh, and boy meets girl at some point.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Hang in there
- By Kelly on 03-04-17
By: Scott Meyer
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Neanderthal Opens the Door to the Universe
- By: Preston Norton
- Narrated by: Christopher Carley
- Length: 11 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 35
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 31
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Story5 out of 5 stars 31
Cliff Hubbard is a huge loser. Literally. His nickname at Happy Valley High School is Neanderthal because he's so enormous - 6'6" and 250 pounds to be exact. Life in his trailer-park home has gone from bad to worse ever since his older brother's suicide. There's no one Cliff hates more than the nauseatingly cool quarterback Aaron Zimmerman. Then Aaron returns after a near-death experience with a bizarre claim: while he was unconscious he saw God, who gave him a list of things to do to make Happy Valley High suck less. And God said there's only one person who can help: Neanderthal.
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5 out of 5 stars
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BEST BOOK EVER
- By Kindle Customer on 01-16-23
By: Preston Norton
What listeners say about Antihooliganism
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Jayden Burnham
- 04-27-23
Peak Comedy
The book is a light-hearted and entertaining read that doesn't shy away from pushing the boundaries of what's expected in comedy literature. If you're looking for a book that will make you laugh out loud and take you on an imaginative adventure, this might just be the one for you! Inside the mind of Mort Gloss is a wonderful place!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Kevin
- 11-29-21
Great Adventure Across Space and Time!
Once you accept the premise of the main character’s (Balloon) newly acquired superpower knowledge of present and future events; the author’s story takes on a realistic journey for the reader to dive into the cosmic imagery of events that unfolded in a tale that can be personally experience. I must confess that I was pleasantly surprised with how this story of book one was hard for me to put down, which was complemented with Ian McEuen’s ability to act in the various character parts in this futuristic journey. I’m excited to finish the science fiction trilogy in the next two books with listening to Ian McEuen along with my personal reading. Both reading and listening to the authors words provide entertainment and an escape from life’s present difficulties that will make you smile and laugh!
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2 people found this helpful