A Well-Trained Wife

My Escape from Christian Patriarchy

By: Tia Levings

Narrated by: Tia Levings

This gripping audiobook is a strong choice alongside books about high-demand religion, overcoming odds, and finding inner strength in impossible situations."—Booklist (Starred Review)

This program is read by the author.

“Today it hit me when he hit me, blood shaking in my brain. Maybe there wasn’t a savior coming. Maybe it was up to me to save me.”

Recruited into the fundamentalist Quiverfull movement as a young wife, Tia Levings learned that being a good Christian meant following a list of additional life principles—a series of secret, special rules to obey. Being a godly and submissive wife in Christian Patriarchy included strict discipline, isolation, and an alternative lifestyle that appeared wholesome to outsiders. Women were to be silent, “keepers of the home.”

Tia knew that to their neighbors her family was strange, but she also couldn't risk exposing their secret lifestyle to police, doctors, teachers, or anyone outside of their church. Christians were called in scripture to be “in the world, not of it.” So, she hid in plain sight as years of abuse and pain followed. When Tia realized she was the only one who could protect her children from becoming the next generation of patriarchal men and submissive women, she began to resist and question how they lived. But in the patriarchy, a woman with opinions is in danger, and eventually, Tia faced an urgent and extreme choice: stay and face dire consequences, or flee with her children.

Told in a beautiful, honest, and sometimes harrowing voice, A Well-Trained Wife is an unforgettable and timely memoir about a woman's race to save herself and her family and details the ways that extreme views can manifest in a marriage.

A Macmillan Audio production from St. Martin’s Press.

©2024 Tia Levings (P)2024 Macmillan Audio

Critic reviews

“In this brave memoir on domestic violence within Christian patriarchy, Tia Levings vulnerably shares her story of survival. With devastating detail, she reveals the many shades of abuse that happen within the world of evangelicalism, a world that was supposed to protect her. The many women who have walked this path from oppression to freedom will find solidarity in these pages.”—Cait West, author of Rift

"I've never given a book a standing ovation until this one. A Well-Trained Wife is a prayer, for all of us. The world is lucky Tia Levings found her freedom and her voice. A reckoning for those who sanction abuse in the name of salvation."—Ashleigh Renard, author of Swing

"With unflinching honesty and relentless self-reflection, Levings’ debut memoir is a portrait in courage."—Julie Bogart, author of The Brave Learner and Raising Critical Thinkers

Knew it would be great - didn’t realize how great!

I was in a relationship with an evangelical Christian for 7 years. He’s a good person, but it was a bad relationship and I’m happy to say after 7 years of him trying to convert me - he didn’t win. But bc of said relationship, I constantly was educating and inundating myself (an atheist) with stories and voices of people who had left/survived right wing Christianity. Needless to say, Tia had been on my radar for a long time. I’d heard her interviews, followed her on social media etc. So I knew this book would be GOOD. But I was still shocked how good it truly was. I’m so glad I read it, as it’s giving me the hope and courage I need right now. Cannot recommend this book enough. She’s added to my list of feminist heroes.

Incredible look behind the curtains of Christian Patriarchy

I’ve been waiting for this book for almost a year! There’s something extra personal and special in getting to hear the author tell their story in their voice. This book is not an easy listen, but it’s fantastic. Tia’s story is devastating. It’s hard to imagine a human being going through so much pain, yet her story is not uncommon, and that’s the truly horrifying part. She didn’t grow up in a tiny weird cult, she was part of a mega church, and when she asked for help and was told she needed to obey more. There are so many heartbreaking stories in this book, but there is also a lot of hope! I cannot wait to read whatever comes next from Tia. In the meantime, following her on social media is a must for anyone trying to understand MAGA culture as well as anyone working on their on deconstruction!

Gripping, Searing, Hopeful and Healing

I could NOT put this book down. Tia's story was absolutely harrowing. Very dark moments, but also authentic and significant healing. Hearing how she came out on the other side of dangerous fundamentalism left me in awe. This is an absolute MUST READ for everyone, but especially those who think traditional religious fundamentalism is the only way. Especially for the "tradwives". I'm so grateful to Tia for sharing her story. I hope this helps someone, it is absolutely powerful.

The truth

This book will shake you to your core. You will see the hidden truth of the fundamentalist Christian movement, if it already hasn’t crossed your path.

Powerful and empowering

I have followed Tia for awhile. Her harrowing story is as powerful as her strength of character as a strong woman and mother. This book is so timely given the issue of “White Christian Nationalism” in this country. THANK YOU Tia for all that you are doing to help woman!!! ❤️

Amazing!

Tia is such an amazing writer. Her story kept captivated, brought me to tears, and had me rejoicing at her victorious emergence from such trauma. What a treasure she is!

Great listen!

Live the honesty and vulnerability. It was a perfect time for me to listen to this book.

Fabulous

Growing up in a very similar community, I felt this book very deeply. Tia does a great job of describing the fundamentalist life, and how harmful it is.

Amazing Experience

This real life experience is incredible. I resonate with so much of her life! Bravo!

Wow

This is one I’m going to keep with me forever. Growing up Baptist, some parts of this book stung more than others. My life didn’t follow the same path, but not because I was strong enough to assert myself, just simply because I had more than just my “church family”, and I met someone outside the church.

I came upon this book by way of instagram, more specifically one post that one friend shared. That one share led me to download this book in the middle of the night, when I should have been sleeping. It brought up a lot of memories and emotions, but also gave me a much needed cry. It’s one of few books I’ll be buying a physical copy of as well, and I’m happy to contribute to Tia’s travel fund while doing so.