Why Shame Isn’t the End of the Story with Vanessa Marin (164)

Tera sits down with Vanessa Marin, licensed sex therapist and CEO of Vanessa Marin Sex Therapy, to explore how our early messages around sex shape our adult relationships—and how we can reclaim joy, freedom, and connection in the bedroom. Vanessa shares her personal journey of unlearning shame, learning how to speak up for her needs, and rewriting her sexual story. From navigating body confidence to overcoming a sex-negative upbringing, this conversation is a powerful reminder that healing is possible—and your pleasure matters. Whether you're struggling with desire, communication, or emotional intimacy, Vanessa’s insights will leave you encouraged, empowered, and equipped.

Links and Resources:

• Download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/get-the-cew⁠⁠
• Find out how to become a Certified Coach: ⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠
• Find a coach: ⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/all-coaches⁠⁠
• Vanessa Marin on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vanessaandxander/?hl=en
• Website: https://vmtherapy.com/

Chapters:

• 00:00:00 – A Warm Welcome + A Quick Note on Therapy
• 00:00:50 – Meet Vanessa Marin: Sex Therapist, Real Talker, Freedom Fighter
• 00:01:39 – Growing Up Silent: How Shame Shaped Our Sexual Narratives
• 00:04:32 – From Shame to Liberation: Vanessa’s Personal Turning Point
• 00:06:11 – The Call to Sex Therapy: Where Curiosity Meets Calling
• 00:11:01 – Kids, Chaos & Connection: Keeping Intimacy Alive in Parenthood
• 00:17:21 – Desire Decoded: What Your Libido Might Be Telling You
• 00:23:02 – Let’s Talk Initiation: Who Starts, Why It Matters
• 00:29:42 – Spicing It Up: Creating a More Playful Sexual Menu
• 00:30:09 – What Actually Works for You? Redefining Sexual Connection
• 00:31:13 – Vanessa’s Go-To Tools & Practices for Better Sex
• 00:32:58 – Sex Positions: Myths, Pressure & What to Let Go Of
• 00:33:26 – Fresh Energy: How to Stay Curious in Long-Term Love
• 00:36:16 – Permission to Laugh: Why Playfulness Belongs in the Bedroom
• 00:42:38 – Too Busy for Sex? Why Prioritizing It Changes Everything
• 00:46:55 – It’s More Than Just the Act: The Deeper Value of Sex
• 00:47:52 – Orgasm Isn’t the Goal: Navigating Challenges Without Shame
• 00:50:38 – Where Emotional Safety Meets Sexual Connection