“Suck it up!”, “Walk it off!”, “Don’t be a girl!” – these are toxic things we were told as kids that made us put a mask over our authentic selves. Jodie and Stephanie explore the profound and complex topic of internal family systems (IFS), and the interrelated concepts of masking and unmasking. Plus, how these psychological shields can be both a protective mechanism and a hindrance, often concealing our most vulnerable and authentic selves. We discuss the idea of 'exiles' – those parts of us that are deeply hurt and inform our present lives – and how they interact with 'managers' and 'firefighters', the parts of us that strive to protect our exiles from being triggered.

Jodie and Stephanie attempt to answer questions like:

What is the role of vulnerability in our personal and professional lives?

How important is it to honour our inner child and how does this relate to authenticity?

How can unmasking lead to more authentic relationships and a stronger, more genuine connection with others?

How do we remove our masks and become more of our authentic selves?

Chapters:

(00:02) Unmasking and Authenticity

We explore the topic of internal family systems (IFS) and the concepts of masking and unmasking. We discuss how masking can be helpful, and how unmasking is essential for self-improvement, growth, and relationships. We also talk about the idea of exiles, which are the hurt and vulnerable parts of ourselves, and how they inform our present life.

(09:27) Importance of Authenticity and Emotional Expression

We discuss how managers, firefighters, and exiles can serve a protective purpose, but also how we can recognize when these masks no longer serve us. We explore how vulnerability is often not rewarded in the workplace and how people use masks as a form of survival. We emphasise the importance of creating a safe space to process and release emotions.

(15:04) Embracing Authenticity in Parenting and Self-Growth

We look at the need for self-compassion and honouring our inner child. We discuss how unmasking can help us become more of our authentic selves, and how to recognize when masks are no longer serving us. We also explore the use of IFS for inner child work, and how we can use it to foster authenticity.

(21:00) Discovering Authenticity and Removing Masks

We explore the importance of self-compassion and the power of unmasking to lead to more authentic relationships. We discuss how our younger selves often mask their true identities out of fear of not fitting in, and how important it is to have people in your life that support you in dropping that mask and embracing your true self.

Resources:

Internal Family Systems (IFS) pie chart (on Managers, Firefighters and Exiles)

More information on Jodie-Lockey Duesling

More information on Stephanie Dinsmore

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Disclaimer: Please note that while the "Therapists off the Clock" presents discussions on various mental health topics and provides general advice and education, it is not a substitute for professional mental health services or counselling. The information shared by the hosts is based on their professional experiences and personal...