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פסול מלהיות אדם [Invalid from Being Human]
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פסול מלהיות אדם [Invalid from Being Human]
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Narrado por:
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ניר שאולוף
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De:
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אוסמו דזאי
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עינת קופר
Acerca de esta escucha
״תמיד פחדתי מבני אדם, לא היה לי ביטחון בדבריי או במעשיי כבן אדם. את סבלי וייסוריי הצנעתי בתיבה קטנה בתוך חזי. את המלנכוליה ואת העצבנות הסתרתי במחשכים, עטיתי על עצמי אופטימיות מוחלטת ותמימה, וכך, צעד אחר צעד, הלכתי וליטשתי את דמותי כליצן תימהוני.״
סופר מקבל לידיו מבעלת בית מרזח תצלומים ישנים ויומנים שנכתבו בידי גבר צעיר. אובה יוזו, כותב היומנים, מגולל את סיפור חייו מאז שהיה ילד שנולד למשפחה עשירה בצפון יפן ועד לפורענויות הפוקדות את חייו כבוגר המביאות אותו בסופו של דבר לשים קץ לחייו. יוזו אינו מבין את הסובבים אותו. כילד ואף כבוגר הוא מיטלטל בין הפחד מפני אנשים לבין הרצון להיות נאהב. כבר בגיל צעיר הוא מבין שחייהם של בני האדם מלאים בחוסר כנות גלוי וצעקני ושהם משקרים זה לזה ללא הרף. הוא תמה כיצד אנשים מתעתעים זה בזה ולמרות זאת ממשיכים לחיות בשלום עם עצמם. בניסיון להתמודד עם הניכור יוזו הופך לליצן. הוא מצליח להצחיק את הסובבים תוך שהוא מעמיד פנים שזה קורה לו בטבעיות ומצליח לזכות במעט חיבה. המודעות העצמית הנוקבת של יוזו מביאה אותו לידי הכרה שבדיוק כמו האנשים סביבו, גם הוא הופך למי שאיננו מסוגל לומר מילה אחת של אמת.
התפיסה הרווחת שאוסמו דזאי כתב בספריו בעצם את סיפור חייו, אין בה די כדי להסביר כיצד במשך עשרות שנים לאחר מותו יצירותיו מככבות ברשימות רבי המכר ביפן. אוסמו דזאי כותב בשפה פשוטה וישירה המדברת אל הקורא ומאפשרת לו בנקל להזדהות עם גיבוריו. החשיפה, המודעות העצמית חסרת הפשרות הקלועה בנרקיסיזם ורגשי אשמה אצל דזאי יש בה מין אוניברסליות השובה את לב הקורא המודרני.
״...ממילא אין דבר בעולם שיכול לשמח אותי״
Please note: This audiobook is in Hebrew.
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