charlottebrown

Great, hearfelt and real.

Revisado: 02-03-25

4.5 ★

I really enjoyed this. While reading, I had no idea what I'd end up rating it, but the more I think about this book now, the more I like it.

The story follows Cleo (24) and Frank (45), who meet, quickly fall for each other, get married and then watch their relationship become increasingly toxic.

“When the darkest part of you meets the darkest part of me, it creates light.”

・❥・Cleo
I think her character is a pretty realistic portrayal of a women in her 20s. She is an artist, has a charming and charismatic personality, she is very outspoken and a feminist. And yet, on the inside she feels emotions very deeply, struggles with depression, and above all wants to be loved. Loved enough to be chosen over anything else. I'm not trying to throw women in any boxes, but I think Cleo is a character many people could resonate with, on some level. She makes many questionable or morally grey choices, has lot of issues, but I never questioned whether she's a good person.

・❥・Frank
Now, he is a troubled man. He was pretty charming in the beginning – a self made man with a strong work ethic, happy to help out Cleo, and truly enamored with her. Over time, though, he turns out to be just as lost as Cleo, but where for her it's more of a “trying to find out who i am” phase, for him it's just a “that's who I am, and I don't wan to change” time in life. He's figured out a way of life that works for him, and I think it's not even the idea change that scares him, just the fact that someone pointed out that his way was flawed and he <i>should</i> change.

・❥・Their relationship
I don't want to spoil to much here so I'll just say 2 things.
1. They love each other
2. They are not willing to change for each other .

Initially I was going to say that they didn't love each other enough to change, but I don't think that's the case. I just think their relationship wasn't the right environment for those changes to happen.

・❥・The writing
I loved it. I honestly enjoy that we don't get the full view into the characters' minds, just glimpses months apart. I do understand how that can be annoying, but I personally like this kind of writing. It resonates with me, and I think it's because it's how real-life relationships often work.

We also get a couple of chapters from the perspective of other characters, who are close with Cleo and Frank, and I enjoyed those too. I'm especially glad we got to see Eleanor's point of view, because, as always, I like to feel conflicted. I like when authors take a character that I want to dislike, show me their perspective and personality, and make me like them despite myself.

・❥・ Now, I've seen a lot of people saying that the characters' traits and feelings are over exaggerated and feel almost caricature-like. I get why someone wouldn't like that, but I don't think that's unintentional on the author's part. That's what literature often does. It takes a bunch struggles some people go through and gives them a face. The characters are sometimes stereotypical, yes, but that also makes them super interesting to read about.

・❥・ Lastly, all these characters are difficult, sometimes problematic, make bad choices, say awful things and will probably annoy you. But in the end, I still rooted for them. I wanted to see them heal, learn more about themselves, find out what's good for them, and focus on that.

・❥・The ending was perfect for the story. I did leave me with that “what do you mean that's it?!” kind of a feeling, but I do think that's the right way to end their story.

I really loved the story, 4.5 stars. If you enjoy literary-fiction in general or maybe Sally Rooney, you'd probably like this too.

𝓜𝔂 𝓯𝓪𝓿𝓸𝓻𝓲𝓽𝓮 𝓺𝓾𝓸𝓽𝓮𝓼:

“Fun was fine when you were young, but as you got older it was kindness that counted, kindness that showed up.”

“Fondness was the best word she could think of to describe what they felt for each other. Fondness was warm but not tepid, the color of amber, more affectionate than friendship but less complicated than love.”

“He wished he loved her a little more or hated her a little less, something to tip the scale. Instead, he lived in the fraught balance between the two, each increasing the intensity of the other.”

“Those have to be the saddest words a person can utter.”
“What?”
“‘That’s just who I am.’”
“Why?”
“Because it shows a total unwillingness to change. That is not just who you are, Frank. It’s who you’ve become, who you choose to be. You just refuse to acknowledge the choice.”

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