What Really Happens in Bed Audiobook By Julia Sokol, Steven Carter cover art

What Really Happens in Bed

A Demystification of Sex

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What Really Happens in Bed

By: Julia Sokol, Steven Carter
Narrated by: Ruby Westwood
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About this listen

From the authors of the best-selling Men Who Can't Love comes a frank, revealing, and reassuringly honest book about sexual relationships. The truth about people's intimate behavior, gained from hundreds of interviews, provides relevant and valuable insights in today's real-life sexual practices.

©1989 Steven Carter and Julia Sokol Coopersmith (P)2012 Audible, Inc.
Marriage & Long-Term Partnerships Personal Development Psychology Sex Instruction
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Editorial reviews

Sex is of course a driving, foundational element of human life. In What Really Happens in Bed: A Demystification of Sex, fellow psychologists and frequent collaborators Steven Carter and Julia Sokol share their findings after conducting 250 interviews. Their diverse subjects explain what they want, what they do, who they do it with, what enables sex, and what impedes it. What do Carter and Sokol learn? Among other things, that everyone withholds feelings of dissatisfaction, and that many single and married people feel isolated and sexually frustrated. More interestingly, the authors unearth core differences in how men and women feel about their sexual needs, concerns, and practices. Narrator Ruby Westwood shares this sobering text, of relevance to anyone who has a less-than-perfect sex life.

What listeners say about What Really Happens in Bed

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Good book

I enjoyed this book as it was a qualitative approach to discussing sexual experiences. It is dated but still has good information in it.

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    4 out of 5 stars
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Interesting

A validation that sexual thoughts and experiences, no matter how crqzy, are common. Interviews are from years ago but still mostly valid

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    3 out of 5 stars
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Dated but still relevant

This work is from 1989. I’d be interested to hear an updated one which could address things like the hook-up culture, using tinder, or struggling with gender nonconformity.

While dated, I found the book to be very worthwhile. It is a qualitative study that is a compilation of stories that the researchers gathered about men and women who shared about their (mostly heterosexual) sex life.

Yes. It’s worth a listen.

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    4 out of 5 stars

Helpful compilation of ideas.

Although the information is 35 years old, it was helpful to my understanding modern human sexual relationships. The book is a barrage of ideas and concepts and by the time I was done I thought “well there are a lot of possibilities and we are definitely not all the same.” Anyone struggling with or without sex likely will find the information useful.

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very eye opening

Definitely worth the read to know more about your partner and sex in general .
worth the time , and easy to listen to

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wonderful! insightful!

I really enjoyed hearing other couple's journeys. It is reassuring to hear all the different experiences possible.

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Very informative and still relevant 31 years later

Other than having this book narrated by a British person, which made it difficult to remember this is about Americans, it is very informative and enjoyable. I could relate to many of the people interviewed and it helped me to understand things that will help me communicate more clearly with my husband.

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Enlightening

I appreciate this book. This is candid information that I would never have grasped had this book not been available. There are a great many things I have learned and now know others have experienced or do experience.

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Who ARE these repressed people?

Before I finished Chapter 2, I was wondering what methods the researchers had used to find so many people who can't talk to their partners about sex. Then I realized the book was based on interviews done in the 1980s. I guess it's instructive to see how far we've come in male-female relationships, but I don't think it's worth sticking around to the end to see what else they found of value.

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    2 out of 5 stars

Horribly dated - release date VERY misleading

This title was listed with a 2012 release date. That’s one of the reasons I felt comfortable getting it. Also description avoids mentioning anything about when.
However, it is at least 35 YEARS OLD. Contemporary references to watching LA LAW, worries about AIDS (today we use HIV), etc. absolutely date the narrative to the early to mid-80’s.
Thought it might work to listen since I people in audiobook are less than 10 years older. However not even ½ way through, I stopped.

The book is fine and the British narrator was clearly chosen to “sanitize” content.

VERY disappointed this was added to Audible. Highly mischaracterized.

Had they (publisher, audiobook producer &/or Audible) been honest, the description should have said “groundbreaking 1980’s study of sexual habits of adults” or something like it.

In the end, a COMPLETE waste of time.

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7 people found this helpful